Day 12, and last show- June 2.  Düsseldorf​: ​
I live in dread of not performing ever again. It's not an irrational fear. Tonight's show at the Düsseldorf Jazz Festival marks the end of our European spring tour, the "Woman, Who's A Woman" + special "man" guest tour. I did it all. Booking, promotion, hiring, firing, buying flights, driving and singing. Time to scream. We play a loud, raging set with hefty doses of sweetness and spunk alike to a very attentive audience. I speak little to our audience tonight, circling back to the image of the Titanic, deck chairs reshuffled and those words: "make the planet great again." I can't think of much else all day. Shivering, I nail "Amsterdam." the Jacques Brel cover, and shatter when I get off stage, unable to stand. Darkness pierced by smiles of strangers and friends, hugs. Is this it? What changed during the course of this tour? Sylvie Simmons now owns my Tucson home as of yesterday. I've fallen in love every single night with a different sound man—with my bandmates too, my wonderful, supportive, talented and wickedly fun and unencumbered bandmates Annie Dolan, Connor Gallaher and Brittany Katter. Dear Brian and Tucson Weekly, I have no dirt for you. No one got in trouble on this tour. No one got hurt. We weren't tar and feathered. Howe Gelb, our own homebrewed Casper, haunted the tour from Paris to finish. This has been easy. Not much else from this point will be. The return to mundane reality. Silence. In the morning, we will drive back to Paris and return flights to Tucson for the band. On Tuesday, I will go back home to my wooden sailboat in England. Thanks for reading. Till next!

Read the previous Marianne Dissard Tour Diaries entry here.