Saxon, Kelli–you’re both fuckwits! Arizona’s motto should be: We got cactus! Quarter No. 2 is not only the finest design of the five, but perhaps the best quarter design of all the 53 states. I close my eyes, and I can still see it. It’s the last thing I think about when I fall asleep at night and the first thing on my mind when I wake in the morning. No. 1 doesn’t even have one single thorn. And Lewis and Martin in their little boat? Give me a break. They’re not even from Arizona! Listen to me–I’ve been in the business a lot longer than either one of you. VOTE QUARTER NO. 2!!!

This article appears in Apr 12-18, 2007.

Getting hassled by The Man Mild-mannered reporter

21 replies on “My Idiot Colleagues Are Totally Wrong”

  1. I am beginning to wonder which group is more batty: Our writers, or the Sept. 11 conspiracy theorists. (And I say that with love.)

  2. Quarter No. 2 needs a visit to the 360-degree mirror with Clinton and Stacy, to make the transition from “geek” to “chic.”

  7. I blame Saxon for starting this meaningless dispute in the first place. And Nintzel, you need to find some better things to think about before you fall asleep. As I told Saxon in a different conversation, when coming across a quarter, I don’t think to myself, “They better have done justice to the state in question when designing this quarter,” I think, “F*** YA! Now I can pay this stupid parking meter!” Besides, have any of you been injured by a cactus? What a painful representation of our state!

  9. How ’bout a Dollar sign, both sides (that would be obverse and reverse)

    What could be more Arizona than that?

  10. How anyone can call this a “meaningless debate” is beyond me. The fate of the Arizona quarter–the great representation of our state on the back on America’s favorite coin–rests on whether the people of Arizona recognize the splendor of Design No. 2. It sends a shudder through my heart to think they might be misled by rookie reporters into thinking another design is the way to go.

    And Saxon–I’ve watched waaaay more What Not To Wear than you have, and I can assure that Stacy and Clinton would both say that Design No. 2 creates the perfect balance between desert and canyon, just as an A-frame skirt gives the right weight to that black turtleneck.

  11. no,No,NO, a dollar sign overlay on the cactus (obverse) and a dollar sign overlay on the canyon (reverse). Or should it be the other way around?

    What could be more Arizona than that?

  12. “What could be more Arizona than that?”

    A picture of John McCain on one side and on the reverse a picture of a bible, a pistol, then a dollar sign.

  13. Oh oh, even better, a picture of a day laborer in front of a Home Depot on one side and then a picture of a bible, a pistol and a dollar bill.

  14. I’m sorry, Jim, but I have to go with #3. The saguaro in #2 looks sickly and deformed. Plus, the flag that says “Grand Canyon State” on number #2 is cheesy.

    But I like Rob’s idea for an Arizona quarter better. Or what about Evan Mecham stuffing dollars in his pocket while a Minuteman (or land developer?) points a gun at a cactus?

  15. What about a drawing of the border minutemen with cactus as their fig leaf? Meaningful attire for pricks.

  16. quarter #6 was inadvertently left off the site — it features ev meacham and a picture of mlk with a line drawn thru him. it gets my vote.

  18. “I am beginning to wonder which group is more batty: Our writers, or the Sept. 11 conspiracy theorists. (And I say that with love.)”

    No you don’t…

    Numba 2!

  20. Listen up, you primitive screwheads: Quarter No. 2 is the coin of choice! Go vote for it right now or face the wrath of my boomstick!

  21. I do NOT EVEN WANT TO KNOW what Jim is referring to when he mentions his “boomstick.”

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