While the economy is getting better, a lot of us could probably use a little extra money. Well, I’ve got the perfect job for you—become a state legislator. The pay ($24,000 a year) is really good, considering the meager amount of “work” that must be done in exchange for all that skrilla.
Why, in the past couple weeks, not only did the members of the ruling party run out into the streets and crow about how they had dicked over all the school kids in Arizona (except their own, of course) and gotten away with it, they then patted themselves on the back for having done so in record time.
It’s like, “Hey, I know I broke into your house, knocked you in the head, and stole all your money and jewelry, but I did it really fast, so you’ll still be able to catch most of ‘NCIS.’ No wait! I’m stealing your television, too, so I can give it to a rich friend of mine.”
There should be a lot of open seats in the 2016 election because I get the feeling that a lot of the members of the ruling party will be eyeballing other elected offices. See, the legislative session went so smoothly for them—which isn’t all that hard when the ruling party and its financial backers simultaneously own the House, the Senate and the Governor’s Office—they probably think that it’s time for them to take their game to the next level. Head off to evil Washington D.C. and show those Commie-lovin’, Uptown Funk-singin’, gay abortion-havin’, left-wing limp wrists how it’s done in Uh-Murr-kuh.
However, they’re not going to leave without knowing that their legacy is intact, at least for one more election cycle or so. They have to know that their successors will continue to give tax breaks to corporations, even when those corporations say that the money would be better spent on education. They’ll want to be certain that the next person will follow blindly the inconsistent and self-serving rantings of the Goldwater Institute; will take seriously the hateful crapola that spews forth from the mouth of Center For Arizona Policy head Cathi Herrod; and has an understanding of just how important private, for-profit prisons are to the Arizona economy. Oh yeah, they’ll also have to leave their weekends open for bus trips up to Nevada to listen to Uncle Cliven Bundy tell folksy tales about Negroes sitting on the front porch.
While recent history has shown that just about anybody can get elected to the Arizona Legislature, there are two or three abilities (I can’t, in good conscience, call them skills) that potential lawmakers must have. They include:
•The ability to talk out of both sides of one’s mouth, sometimes simultaneously. This is vital. From one side must come a steady backbeat of hatred, fear, and misrepresentation of the responsibilities of the federal government. You have to demonize Washington to get elected in Arizona. You use all kinds of scary catch-phrases—the one topping the charts these days is “federal overreach”—and then, once in office, you turn around and do the same thing to the Arizona cities and counties that you really don’t give a crap about, but would like to grind under your heel, anyway.
You don’t want the federal government telling Arizonans that their kids need to know certain basic things before they get out of high school, but it’s perfectly okay for the state to do that. Down with Common Core, but up with Ducey’s Civics.
(I have to state unequivocally and with no sarcasm whatsoever that I believe that all graduating seniors should have a full understanding of how their government[s] should work, how things came to be this screwed up, and that they have the ability to fix things in their lifetimes.)
(It is a common reaction to suggest that members of the Legislature should have to take the Civics test, as well. I go one step further. I think that each member should have to score 100 percent before they’re allowed to cast a vote in the House or Senate. I’d bet that fewer than half of the current members know that there are 27 Amendments to the U.S. Constitution.)
It just kills me that they scream bloody murder about federal intrusion into state affairs and have no qualms whatsoever about telling cities and counties what they can and can’t do. (I know that those “powers” are written into the Arizona Constitution, but just because you can do something doesn’t mean that you should.) If Tucson wants to allow local churches to put up signs that read “No Guns Allowed; This is a House of God, You Freaking Idiot,” that’s not the state’s business.
There are a few other abilities that would-be candidates must have, but I’ll have to list them at a later date. We’ve got time. The only people who are running for something now are a handful of fringe Tea Party kooks who claim to be running for president, but are actually applying for the entry-level position of attack dog VP candidate on the GOP ticket.
For the next few months here in Arizona, all we can do is sit back and watch the unfolding of the damage done by the current crop of child haters, malcontents and ne’er-do-wells.
This article appears in Apr 16-22, 2015.
A fine description of the ruling party. How about writing about the valiant efforts of the minority party to stop all this stupid nonsense? By the way the “ruling party” is Republican – for people who don’t really know what is going on up there.
Is it possible, Tom, that you could recognize a couple of truths:
First, state legislators honestly believe that what they are doing is best for the state.
(That would make your snippy sarcasms more difficult to write, though – easier to do it as you do.)
Second, that state legislators ask for campaign support from interests they genuinely believe in, and support their beliefs in their votes, not because they got a little campaign money.
(Would any Republican expect campaign support from the Teacher’s Union or Planned Parenthood powers-that-control-the-purse strings or Tucson Weekly?)
I hope we are learning that we must vote. So many Democrats did not and why this is a pattern for midterm elections I don’t know. I also know that many people who call themselves Republican do not like what is happening at all. So I hope they too pay closer attention to what the people running say. I did hear Ducey say on multiple occasions that he would not pay back the 1.2 billion owed to education that was voted in by the people. I asked my Republican friends why they are surprised when he made these drastic cuts to education. They really didn’t hear him say that in fact they heard him say something to the effect that he would support education. I didn’t hear that however I was so amazed that Ducey had the audacity to say he would not pay back what the legislators took that I may have been temporarily deaf. I wish there was a way we could prosecute but with paper shuffling, it looks like some was paid back but with the cuts, education is actually in the negative quite a bit. So all I can say is I hope the people pay really close attention and also that we can at least get Ducey out by impeachment or recall. He is a crook as far as I am concerned as well as other legislators. Democrats I hope you all vote…. every single one in every election… both state and national. We need your votes.
Normally, as a non-aligned voter, I would take exception to Danehy’s attack on the right wing Republican legislators. They are an easy target, sitting ducks for progressive columnists (while similar outrage at the shenanigans of the “Baja” democrats in Tucson and Pima County ever surfaces in Tom’s columns). But today, with the trolls rampaging and licking their drooling chops, it is impossible not to agree with him.
My question is where are the fighting men and women of the minority party, or more pointedly, who are they and what actions are they taking to stand up and take action? While definitely not quislings, they do seem to be hiding in the shadows, reluctant to fight or create much of a ruckus. Rope a dope may have worked for Ali, but he had skills, strength and stamina. Were the Democrats elected to vigorously oppose the worst legislation or simply register a vote against the most blatant excesses and retire to their chambers muttering beneath their breath?
Arizona is in trouble and needs a constant, vigorous and organized loyal opposition. The minority party and its leadership in the legislature is neither energized or cohesive. They appear timid, as guilty in their acquiescence as their opponents are in their mad rush to cripple the state.
Alot of us could probably use a little extra money. You mean the 19 million who are currently unemployed in this great economy ? Do you honestly believe Republicians hate children? Have you any idea how stupid you sound? For someone who claims not to drink and supposedly hates drugs, you do make me wonder.
CW13 sez..”Have you any idea how stupid you sound? For someone who claims not to drink and supposedly hates drugs, you do make me wonder.”
Well, your comments leave no doubt about you using drinking and being stupid.
I thought it was ‘says’ not sez. But I’m the dumb one. And how the Hell do you use drinking? I always thought it was drugs that one uses, but as I said I’m the dumb one.
So tell me Mr. Gorilla, what did I say that was so stupid? 19 million without jobs is a fact. Grown men in public office really hate kids. Get real. Then again you probably believe it like the dummy that you are. I annoy you to no end, don’t I? If I’m that stupid, just ignore me. But that ain’t happening and I love it.
“what did I say that was so stupid?”….you ask…
Everything …..sez I .
You keeping proving my point, Gorilla Girl and I love it. And yeah, you still can’t spell.
P.S. You still didn’t answer my question. You libs aren’t even a challange.
And you Mr. CW13 are nothing more than a bully and a thug.
Yeah, but I’m kinda cute for a right winger.
People, please take note of something. In my first comment I made 2 points.
1) 19 million out of work does not make for a good economy.
2) Claiming that an entire political party HATES kids is a stupid statement even by Pulitizer Tommy’s standards.
Enter Gorilla Man and now Guardians. Instead of challanging what I said they just call me names and leave it at that. In the arena of ideas the Right ( as in correct) trumps the Left (as in whatever remains) every time.
I listen to him every day for the full 3 hours. I’m listening to him as I type this. That’s not what I read, but I thank you for challanging me. I’ll have to double check my sources. Sorry, I was raised that hate is a terrible word. That’s a really cool bus. Did you renovate it yourself?
No, just a pik of a cool old RV. Maybe some day…
cw12 1/2 sez…”And yeah, you still can’t spell.” Oh yes I kan I sez.
And I did answer your question.
Hey…still playing dolls with doggies and dressing them up ?
CW 13 sez…..”Instead of challanging what I said they just call me names “
On comments 3/27 he said this to a poster this…”Wrong agan, Asshole”
Who is it calling names cw…?
Still dressing up in a monkey suit, Apegirl? Boy, do I get under your skin !! And yes, I still dress up my dollies. I was gong to have you over for a tea party, but they’re afraid of grown men that dress like gorillas.
Dearest Commenters, I read the comments on this page, and it’s not hard to see why people hate politics. And politicians. And political parties. But, some will not be satisfied until half of this nation is hating the other half. –YHS, CF
#EndHate
Not sure how I stumbled on to this tucson weekly rag but holy crap is this Tom Danehy a first class douche bag! He epitomizes everything that’s wrong with giving the public at large a soap box on which to spew their hate. Tom – most of us on the Right, Conservatives, are great people serving our communities, raising families and have philosophies that we logically and factually believe will help us and our country and that’s why some of us run for the positions in government (legislature, not “legislatur” as you call it in the title of the post). You on the other hand are a miserable little man with nothing to offer but hateful bile.