Now that Rip Van Obama has awakened from his 20-something-month slumber and is back on the trail reminding us why we voted for him, things might be looking up slightly for next Election Day—but it will still probably be a bleak night. Here are 10 things that I really don’t want to happen, in order from Relatively Sucko to Potentially Life-Altering.
10. California passes its marijuana proposition. Their state is bankrupt; they’re paying teachers with grocery coupons; and the solution is to make it even easier to get stoned? That will do wonders for productivity. And they claim that there’s tax revenue to be had from a drug that will be legally grown in one’s own back yard. Shrewd.
9. Carly Fiorina and/or Meg Whitman win in California. I don’t care that they’re women or that they’re Republican. I just don’t like what they’re doing. A study by the National Institute on Money in State Politics found that 11 percent of candidates who funded their campaigns with their own personal fortunes ended up winning their races. I would like that number to be much closer to 0 percent. Oh, why quibble? Let’s just make it a flat 0 percent, and I’ll be happy.
It’s legal for them to spend their own money, and it’s fine with me if they run. I just don’t want them to win. People with inherited money (Ben Quayle) have a sense of entitlement, and people who made a lot of money think that they’re always right. Just because you’re good and/or lucky at one thing doesn’t mean you’ll be good and/or lucky at another. Mostly, I’d just really rather not find out the hard way.
8. Arizona’s “Medical Marijuana” proposition passes. No, I didn’t mention this one before! Pay attention, Pothead. That narcotic done made you null and void.
7. Ruth McClung (or Raúl Grijalva) wins in Congressional District 7. McClung’s whole “rocket scientist” shtick was cute, but it just shows that smart people can have some really dumb-ass ideas. The fact that e to the i pi power equals negative 1 is cool, but it doesn’t apply to the real world. Neither do crackpot notions like school vouchers or privatizing Social Security.
As for Grijalva, he deserves to be slapped for that ridiculous boycott of Arizona he proposed. I’d ask what he was thinking, but he obviously wasn’t.
Maybe it would be best if Harley Meyer won the seat and held it for a term so we could get fresh Democratic blood in there. And no, Ramón Valadez doesn’t qualify as fresh blood. If they were still selling Geritol, he’d be the poster child.
6. Frank Antenori, et al. get re-elected. Then they will step up their scorched-earth campaign against teachers, public schools, safe drivers, those who don’t want to sit down at a family restaurant next to a pistol-packin’ mama, people whose names end with “z” and a whole lot of other folks and institutions. They make us look like Mississippi in the 1960s, and then they try to blame the tax structure for companies not wanting to relocate here.
5. Russell Pearce gets re-elected. If this guy gets his way, people born in California won’t automatically be U.S. citizens.
4. Jan Brewer wins in the race for governor. She fell into the job, stumbled around, fell off the political map and then signed a piece of paper that made her an overnight hero to lots of people who look like Kid Rock. If she wins this thing, she’ll stumble around for the next four years while the thugs in the Legislature complete their aforementioned mission from God.
There was an episode of The Simpsons in which Homer joins a super-secret society known as The Stonecutters. The members have access to perks including an exclusive road that bypasses freeway congestion. (They also take credit for making Steve Guttenberg a star.) And, if there’s an emergency, they get extra-special service if they dial 9-1-2. With our luck, in the spring of 2014, the Republican Legislature will send Jan Brewer SB 1071—an even harsher version of SB 1070—to boost her then-sagging prospects.
3. Tucson City Proposition 401 passes. I don’t care about the pay raises. I just wish they’d had the good sense to cut the terms from four years down to two. And while the thought of a city manager having the power to fire department heads might sound superficially appealing to some, it’s absolutely insane. Those jobs are civil service for a reason. The department heads generally have engineering backgrounds and often have decades of experience in their fields. Replacing them with a bunch of know-nothing yes men who have to kiss a city manager’s butt to retain their jobs is a recipe for disaster.
If a camel is a horse built by a committee, just imagine a bridge built by a bunch of political appointees.
2. Jesse Kelly wins in Congressional District 8. Gabrielle Giffords is not my favorite legislator, but neither is she the ditz who first ran for Congress four years ago. She seems to be getting the hang of it. Plus (and it’s a big plus) she’s not Jesse Kelly, who has some dangerous ideas and actually appears to believe the nonsense he spouts.
1. Christine O’Donnell wins in Delaware and casts a spell on everybody who has made fun of her.
This article appears in Oct 28 – Nov 3, 2010.
How can you call yourself a liberal and still be blase to the notion that a congressman who has been voted the most liberal member of Congress might lose to a Neanderthal like McClung?
Grijalva does need to get the message that you don’t boycott your own constituents. I too am a Democrat and will vote McClung. She at least will be in the majority and bring Arizona some more clout. Two years from now after redistricting those that are still in the re-cut district can have the choice of a Democratic alternative that better represents the people.
On Prop 401, even the few opponents of it agree with getting rid of civil service protection for Dept. heads. In fact, you are the very first person who has made this argument. You must have a good friend who is one of these intransigent entrenched “super bureaucrat” Department heads. I’ve read over 100 city chargers across the nation that use this “council-manager” form of government and not one of them extends civil service protection to the Dept. heads.
Jorge great point about McClung being in the majority and having some clout. Grijalva has burnt so many bridges even with his fellow Democrats in the delegation, many who are also headed to defeat, that he can now longer be an effective advocate for the people. Giffords and Goodard were particularly upset with his call for a boycott of our state.
What “clout” do you imagine a first term reactionary congressperson from a backwater state is going to have? What are you talking about?
Two things:
1/ There is clout in being in the majority no matter what state you might be from or what party you might be in. Ruth McClung will be in the new majority.
2/ By “reactionary congressperson” wouldn’t that better describe Grijalva who called for and supported a boycott of the state he represents and the people that elected him. His “reaction” hurt his own constituents. And now he calls it all a “mistake,” but is taking money from groups that are boycotting the state. So in addition to reactionary he is also a hypocrite.
This newspaper, as well as the rest throughout S. Azlan are the reason you people have actually changed S. Azlan in to a “backwater state” in the last 10 years, Go to N.E. Phoenix, Scottsdale and it is like a whole different State. Smoke some more weed, and your brains we become even more delusional.
Can’t wait for the cartel reaction to your demands for “medical” (joke) pot….distribution centers, and the mentally impaired growing their own. Just keep sinking yourselves in to the quicksand with your self-destruction. The cartels don’t like anyone infringing on their business, so don’t be shocked when crime increases due to your need to get more mindless.
I disagree with the writer on several accounts… Jerry Brown for Governor? Please I lived in California for many, many years..I know what Jerry Moonbeam is all about. I’d rather see individuals put their own money into their campaigns as opposed to taking it from “unknown” sources! Ruth McClung… could be the best thing that ever happened to CD7. I would not vote for Raul for dog catcher. Raul can no longer be effective in Arizona or any U.S. state! A boycott of his own state? His ignorant and emotional response did so much damage…I along with many others lost our jobs because of his stupid boycott.
History of Man! or (Why Liberals are liberal)
Humans originally existed as members of small bands of nomadic hunters/gatherers. They lived on deer in the mountains during the summer and would go to the coast and live on fish and lobster in the winter.
The two most important events in all of history were the invention of beer and the invention of the wheel. The wheel was invented to get man to the beer. These were the foundation of modern civilization and together were the catalyst for the splitting of humanity into two distinct subgroups:
1. Liberals
2. Conservatives.
Once beer was discovered, it required grain and that was the beginning of agriculture. Neither the glass bottle nor aluminum can were invented yet, so while our early humans were sitting around waiting for them to be invented, they just stayed close to the brewery. That’s how villages were formed.
Some men spent their days tracking and killing animals to BBQ at night while they were drinking beer. This was the beginning of what is known as the
Conservative movement…
Other men who were weaker and less skilled at hunting learned to live off the conservatives by showing up for the nightly BBQ’s and doing the sewing, fetching, and hair dressing. This was the beginning of the Liberal movement.
Some of these liberal men eventually evolved into women. They became known as girlie-men. Some note worthy liberal achievements include the domestication of cats, the invention of group therapy, group hugs, and the concept of Democratic voting to decide how to divide the meat and beer that conservatives provided
Over the years conservatives came to be symbolized by the largest, most powerful land animal on earth, the elephant. Liberals are symbolized by the jackass for obvious reasons.
Modern liberals like imported beer (with lime added), but most prefer white wine or imported bottled water. They eat raw fish but like their beef well done. Sushi, tofu, and French food are standard liberal fare.. Another interesting evolutionary side note: most of their women have higher testosterone levels than their men. Most social workers, personal injury attorneys, journalists, dreamers in Hollywood and group therapists are liberals. Liberals invented the designated hitter rule because it wasn’t fair to make the pitcher also bat.
Conservatives drink domestic beer, mostly Bud or Miller. They eat red meat and still provide for their women. Conservatives are big game hunters, rodeo cowboys, lumberjacks,construction workers, firemen, medical doctors, police officers, engineers, corporate executives, athletes, members of the
military, airline pilots and generally anyone who works productively.
Conservatives who own companies hire other conservatives who want to work for a living.
Liberals produce little or nothing. They like to govern the producers and decide what to do with the production. Liberals believe Europeans are more enlightened than Americans. That is why most of the liberals remained in Europe when conservatives were coming to America .. They crept in after the Wild West was tamed and created a business of trying to get more for nothing.
Here ends today’s lesson in world history:
Arizona has earned the moniker of “Mississippi of the West” for a reason. We’re # 50 in education (and don’t ask out of how many), We seem to hate small children and anyone with a college education, and the legislature seems to hate anyone who doesn’t have an Anglo sounding name.
We’ve done our best to make the state seem like a bunch of illiterate racists run by a government headed by a person who doesn’t even have a college degree. There are a lot of highly technical jobs you can earn a great living at without a Masters or PhD but I think our elected officials should be required to have at least a Bachelors degree from an accredited four year college.
That would prove that they understand some math, history, social studies, and perhaps a smattering of business, something our legislature seems to have no knowledge of at all. If I ran my household finances the way we run this state, I would be bankrupt or serving time for gross incompetence and fraud.
If you haven’t voted early as many of us do, then use your head and ask the hard questions when you go to the polls.
Just like a flaming liberal to claim (in his #9) that it is better to have someone in political office who has never been successful in their life at doing any real work, and therefore has little or no self-confidence in their decision-making capability, than to have someone who has proven credentials. Where is the most elementary common sense in that?
And leave it to a flaming liberal to oppose school vouchers for people who don’t like the dumbing down and ignorance of founding principles of liberty in America imposed upon students by the leftist NEA-controlled public school system — Gotta keep ’em ignorant and docile, huh, Danehy? Oh, and ESPECIALLY leave it to a flaming liberal to think his desire to not sit next to a “pistol-packin’ mama” in a restaurant should be imposed on others by government fiat. Hey, dude: You can desire that people have no rights all you want, but when you claim your desires should have the force of law, you are defining yourself as a thug. Government has no authority to invest your desires with the force of law. You don’t want to sit in a restaurant next to a woman exercising her God-given right to be armed in self-defense, then stay home. Only in your home do you have the right to say who may be armed and who may not.
Folks who vote for Jan Brewer deserve what they get, and none of it will make them happy, other than the satisfaction of knowing they’re smarter than their governor.
I agree with Danehy on all but the medical marijuana issues. About 10 years ago, when my sister was sufferering with terminal cancer, she and I discussed medical marijuana. Neither of us ever liked to smoke anything, period, but she said that with the pain she was going through, that she would love to be able to do that legally to ease her pain from cancer. At the time, we didn’t know that you could ingest it as a pill and still get the medicinal value. So I am voting for the medical marijuana issue here in Arizona!
I hope the people of LD 30 take notice of this:
6. Frank Antenori, et al. get re-elected. Then they will step up their scorched-earth campaign against teachers, public schools, safe drivers, those who don’t want to sit down at a family restaurant next to a pistol-packin’ mama, people whose names end with “z” and a whole lot of other folks and institutions. They make us look like Mississippi in the 1960s, and then they try to blame the tax structure for companies not wanting to relocate here.
OK, I’m a bit biased because I’ve been volunteering for Antenori’s opponent, Todd Camenisch, who is someone who would actually work for and represent constituents to a standard far above what Anentori has managed to, uh, accomplish. Antenori likes to say that the Democrats won’t discuss the issues but meantime has done his best to dodge any discussion of the issues himself.
I think I’ll grill some fish on election day in old Frank’s honor (and then feed it to my cat, who isn’t fat at all!!!!)
Finally Danahey has written something I can agree with. Proposition 401 removing civil service protection from department heads and deputies is an invitation to corruption. You don’t like, say, the Parks and Rec guy? So fire him and try to hire a professional. You’ll get nothing but yes-man stooges. Do you really want a Finance Director at the mercy of a City Manager? Have you seen some of the City Managers we have had??