Best Actor
Leonardo DiCaprio (The Departed and Blood Diamond)
Runners-up: Hugh Jackman (The Fountain); Will Smith (The Pursuit of Happyness); Ryan Gosling (Half Nelson); Patrick Wilson (Little Children and Hard Candy); Sacha Baron Cohen (Borat)
Best Actress
Helen Mirren (The Queen)
Runners-up: Ellen Page (Hard Candy); Kate Winslet (Little Children); Judi Dench (Notes on a Scandal); Penelope Cruz (Volver); Kirsten Dunst (Marie Antoinette)
Best Supporting Actor
Mark Wahlberg (The Departed)
Runners-up: Jack Nicholson (The Departed); Eddie Murphy (Dreamgirls); Bill Nighy (Notes on a Scandal); Sacha Baron Cohen, Gary Cole and John C. Reilly (Talladega Nights); Jackie Earle Haley (Little Children)
Best Supporting Actress
Catherine O’Hara (For Your Consideration)
Runners-up: Shareeka Epps (Half Nelson); Adriana Barraza (Babel); Cate Blanchett (Babel and Notes on a Scandal); Toni Collette (Little Miss Sunshine); Abigail Breslin (Little Miss Sunshine)
Best Director
Darren Aronofsky (The Fountain)
Worst Actor (Overall)
Nicolas Cage (The Wicker Man … I still can’t believe they got him into that bear suit!)
Worst Actress (Overall)
Sharon Stone (Basic Instinct 2: Risk Addiction)
Best Male Performance in a Bad Movie
Christian Slater (Bobby … Slater was damn good in this garbage film.)
Worst Male Performance in a Good Movie
Larry the Cable Guy’s voice (Cars)
Best Female Performance in a Bad Movie
Uma Thurman (My Super Ex-Girlfriend … that’s two years in a row for Uma.)
Worst Female Performance in a Good Movie
Parker Posey (Superman Returns)
Overrated
A Prairie Home Companion, The Devil Wears Prada
Underrated
The Fountain, Harsh Times
Best Comeback
Sylvester Stallone (Rocky Balboa)
Most Spastic Performance
Sean Penn waving his arms like a freaking maniac (All the King’s Men)
Best Foreign Film
Pan’s Labyrinth
Best Documentary
Jesus Camp
Film You Thought I Was Going to Name Best Documentary
An Inconvenient Truth
Best Animated Movie
A Scanner Darkly
Best Song
“Running the World” by Jarvis Cocker (Children of Men)
Best Score
The Fountain
Best Line of Dialogue
“Your injury is one of ignorance and pride!” –Jean Girard (Sacha Baron Cohen), Talladega Nights
Best Jackass Stunt
Johnny Knoxville getting gored by a bull while blindfolded
Worst Jackass Stunt
Anything involving shit; the puke stuff was actually kind of funny
Best Remake
The Departed
Worst Remake
The Wicker Man
Most Mishandled Movie
Idiocracy (It got dumped into only a couple hundred theaters, and it is one of the funniest movies of the year.)
This article appears in Jan 18-24, 2007.