Tucson Weekly: The Skinny (May 21

Skinny THE MANY FACES OF ANN DAY: As previously reported, GOP state Sen. Ann Day has been on both sides of the incorporation issue. She pledged to her Casas Adobes and Tortolita constituents that she'd support the recent incorporation bill which would recognize the two communities retroactively, and she even declared support for a compromise measure by the champion of incorporation, state Rep. Bill McGibbon of Green Valley, allowing the two towns to continue to exist.
But Day was always lukewarm on the whole issue--she said she'd vote for the compromise bill, but kept whining publicly that it was unconstitutional, hardly a confident approach designed to line up other senators for the bill. In fact, it's the excuse GOP Majority Leader Mark Spitzer used in keeping it off the floor and killing it for this session.
Considering this is the same Spitzer who brought us both public school financing bills (the first chucked by the courts and the second currently headed there), pardon us if we find his interpretation of constitutional law a little weak.
McGibbon and Tortolita Mayor Lan Lester have openly attacked Day for her blatant duplicity. Both gentlemen say they've heard numerous reports from other senators that Day has told them she doesn't want to vote for the bill. She's also reportedly been telling folks to vote against the measure if it should somehow make it to the floor. The Skinny and other media sources have heard this from several other lawmakers as well.
What could be motivating Day into this shabby behavior? Well, she's let it be known that she plans to seek Mikey Boyd's District 1 seat on the Pima County Board of Supervisors in 2000, when term limits will force her out of the Senate. That means she faces one more race in District 12, where she must live with Tortolita and Casas Adobes voters. In the supes race, however, she'll be running in a district where her constituency will be Oro Valley, the foothills, and some Tucson precincts. Expect her to follow Boyd's example and cater slavishly to the Growth Lobby line.
In the meantime, Day hopes this will all go away by the September primary, where she'll face incorporation advocate Ted Schlinkert. And, of course, she's counting on the public's lousy memory for her 2000 race.
Well, nobody's going to forget, Senator. There are plenty of people who plan to spend the rest of your political life reminding everyone just how craven a flake you really are.
COPS THAT GO BUMP IN THE NIGHT: Residents around Wilson Middle School were scared when they heard gunshots and shouting late one night last week. They called 911 and were told it was an Oro Valley Police Department "dog-training exercise."
But Wilson School isn't in Oro Valley, it's in Tortolita. Because the exercise occurred on Amphi property, the Tortolita officials had no jurisdiction. Worse, they weren't even notified, nor were those who live near the school.
The Oro Valley Police Department has since admitted that they used bad judgment and they've promised no further incidents of this nature.
IN SICKNESS AND IN HOME-HEALTH: It would appear a compromise has been worked out regarding the future--and possible demise--of Pima County's Home Health system (See "Who's Killing Home Health," Tucson Weekly, May 7). Whether it will succeed is another question.
By a vote of four to one (Pima County Supervisor Sharon Bronson dissenting), the supes accepted a plan drafted by the administration and Home Health employees that is less Draconian than the earlier proposals made by County Health Czar Dr. Richard Carmona. The new plan reduces some salaries and re-arranges some payments to nurses, but will leave patients and clients with many of the same care providers.
Bronson opposed the plan because she felt the employees had been intimidated into accepting it, so it was still unfair. She also complained that it offers no long-term solution to the county's overall healthcare problems.
Even with those caveats, we're happy to note that the program will continue and the patients will still be served.
VALUE JUDGMENTS: Tortolita Town Clerk Judy Lester was recently comparing land values set by the Pima County Assessor's Office.
For example, a 160-acre parcel near La Cholla Bouelvard and Lambert Lane zoned CR1 (one home per acre) is on the books at $21,500 an acre. Many smaller parcels zoned SR--one home per 3 1/3 acres--are valued between $11,500 and $20,000 an acre. A few are on for much less, as low as $4,000 an acre.
But then Lester noticed something else: the full cash value assigned to a 300-acre parcel at Thornydale and Tangerine roads owned by Forest City Development of Cleveland, Ohio. This is the same Forest City who is using the state Attorney General's Office to carry its lawsuit against the establishment of Tortolita, claiming it isn't really a community. This parcel has been zoned for high-density housing and/or a shopping center for some time. How much do Lyons' guys say it's full cash value is?
A whopping $4,000 an acre for the whole enchilada.
Sure, the Forest City gang won't be developing the property for a few years yet. But they were the ones who decided to sneak through the rezoning at a time they believed was advantageous--and thereby increased the value of the land. And they're the ones who scream when they fear someone might "lower" the value of their holdings through strict development codes.
Meanwhile, we're the ones who'll be stuck with the higher tax bill, increased traffic and bulldozed desert when Forest City builds Stuccopolis and takes the profits back to Cleveland.
ANOTHER GOOD MAN GONE: The Skinny notes with sadness the passing of John Joe Tsosie, who ran the incomparable John's Coffee Shop (a.k.a. county cafeteria) in the basement of the Pima County Administration Building. Tsosie died Friday at age 60. He cheerfully worked to the end. He ran his joint for 29 years with serenity and humor, serving laborers and secretaries as well as judges and big shot-pols, and treating them all alike.
HE'S OUTTA HERE: After all the press coverage concerning the Mexican nationals playing on the Amphi High School baseball team, no one seems to have taken note that Amphi baseball coach Danny Hernandez quietly submitted his resignation on Friday, May 15.
School officials had ordered Hernandez to show up for an "investigation" that afternoon, so they were surprised that the coach apparently was able to make a deal with Amphi's contract lawyer, Barry Corey, to resign rather than go through the process.
That's too bad. If Amphi had fired Hernandez, as we suggested, he'd find it much more difficult to go to work in another school district.
GOOD GUY RETURNS: Enrique Serna, the former Pima County manager, has left his job as manager of the town of Guadalupe. Serna is an executive for the Tucson engineering firm Collins-Pina.
Former District 10 state Sen. Luis Gonzales has replaced Serna in Guadalupe. Serna's term as Pima County manager ran from 1989 through 1992. But the 1993 Board of Supervisors Republican majority of Ed Moore, Mike Boyd and Paul Marsh canned the honest and hard-working Serna, one of the most decent human beings ever to serve the public.
The Moore-led troika replaced Serna with henchman Manoj Vyas and then ordered the slaughter of 14 other county officials. Serna didn't recover on his lawsuit, even though the Board violated his contract. Courts have ruled that managers and clerks serve at the pleasure of the Board. The other firings and demotions cost taxpayers more than $7 million.
Serna was an excellent manager, primarily because he let his top managers, Bruce Postil and Chuck Huckelberry (the current county administrator) manage. Besides, we like his actor brother Pepe Serna.
Of course Serna could have been returned as county manager when Supervisor Dan Eckstrom made such a motion last year. It was blocked by Serna's so-called friend, Supervisor Raul Grijalva, who with his psychic power declared that Eckstrom wasn't being sincere.
SUPPORTING EVIDENCE: When people get flats on county roads or damage their cars or otherwise come to the conclusion that Pima County owes them something, they're instructed to fill out a claim form. One of the most interesting just hit the Clerk of the Board of Supervisors desk: a claim for a 36-B, dark-blue bra. Reason--"not returned." No further details, no dollar amount, no details.
So where's the breast of the story?
ON AN EVEN LIGHTER NOTE: An anonymous reader called us last week on behalf of some buddies to confess they'd been watching the 10 o'clock KGUN-TV, Channel 9, news the day that Air Force A-10 Warthog went down near Kitt Peak.
"At the top of the newscast," he reported, "the gal meant to say the plane had been dropping 'training munitions,' but I swear everybody in this room heard her say it had been dropping 'training musicians.' "
Yeah, we feel that way sometimes when the kids are practicing piano. But damn, who could have guessed KGUN would cover something that far out of town? We'd have liked to have seen what that jet crash looked like from the viewpoint of KGUN's snazzy Toddlercam we told you about last week.

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