Police Dispatch

Luck of the Devil

East Park Avenue

Feb. 25, 5:21 p.m.

A University of Arizona student experienced the epitome of luck when he not only rec ouped his lost wallet—with everything apparently still inside—but also avoided jail despite the fact that everything was apparently still inside ... including a baggie of narcotics, according to the UA Police Department report.

The young man's wallet was found by one of his co-residents in a local communal-living spot. Unable to reach the subject through social media, this kind spirit then went to the UAPD for help in returning the wallet. Even UA officers had trouble actually meeting the wallet's owner—when they first called him he was at a basketball game, and subsequently he simply didn't answer his phone for awhile—but eventually they met with him at a frat house and gave him the wallet.

At first officers didn't tell him that tucked inside the wallet they'd located a baggie containing .5 grams of a white, powdery substance testing positive for cocaine—they merely asked him "if he knew anything about what was inside the wallet," to which he responded, "Uh, maybe, no."

Since the officers had never seen the subject in physical possession of the baggie, they proceeded not to arrest him, instead warning him that if the cocaine had indeed belonged to him, he'd better change his ways, since "continued use could have serious implications and get him arrested."

The undoubtedly much-relieved young man said he understood and "would not do anything like that again" (still avoiding arrest even after this implicating statement). Officers gave him back his wallet, complete with his IDs but minus the cocaine (which was destroyed).