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YOU KILLED MY PUSSY, YOU PUSSY!

EAST MILTON ROAD MAY 3, 1:26 P.M.

A man devoted to his cat's well-being lashed out at his neighbors and made a violent scene, according to a Pima County Sheriff's Department report.

After receiving an assault call, deputies talked to a male and a female standing in front of their house, where they said a neighbor had come outside and started screaming, "Who poisoned my cat? I'm going to kill you, whoever poisoned my cat!" The female said the neighbor was looking directly at her and her male companion (her boyfriend) when he started yelling, "I'm going to kill you!" and began swinging a shovel around and slamming it on the ground.

When deputies made contact with the subject, he immediately turned and put his hands behind his back. He was asked to sit down and relax.

The man explained that he'd been inside his house when he saw his cat fall over and meow. That upset him, he said, especially when he recalled that the male reportee's cousins had said that they kill cats. He admitted grabbing a shovel, going outside and "hollering" down the street, "You pussy motherfuckers. Who poisoned my cat? I'm going to kill you!" He insisted that he wasn't speaking to anybody specifically.

He said he then went back inside, washed his cat off, and noticed that it appeared to be feeling much better.

The subject was arrested for disturbing the peace and disorderly conduct. The police report didn't mention whether the cat was actually ill.


JUST CHECK HER FINGERNAILS

NORTHWEST SIDE MAY 8, 1:30 P.M.

An accused makeup pilferer made an odd and extreme threat when confronted, according to a PCSD report.

The reportee, a 20-something northwest Tucson resident, told deputies that she and her boyfriend had gone out to breakfast, and when they returned, she noticed that her purple nail polish and black eyeliner were missing. She hypothesized that the items had been stolen by her boyfriend's brother's girlfriend, since the boyfriend's brother and his girlfriend often came over and "help(ed) themselves to the residence." She said the boyfriend's brother's girlfriend was known for stealing items.

When the woman went to the boyfriend's brother's girlfriend's apartment, she said, the accused thief got angry and stated that she was going to have the reportee "killed by Hells Angels."

The accused girlfriend denied the theft, and none of the missing items were found in her apartment. No one was arrested.

More by Anna Mirocha

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