Police Dispatch

Erection Ejection (Not That Kind!)

North Highland Avenue

Oct. 2, 11:51 a.m.

A man was removed from a public pool after admonishment for his history of hard-ons, bothersome to other swimmers, a University of Arizona Police Department report said.

A UA officer was called to the swimming pool at the Student Recreation Center, 1400 N. Highland Ave., where an employee told him one swimmer had reported a man lying on a beach chair with an obvious erection. His penis was allegedly still inside his shorts, but its, well, prominence had upset the other pool patrons.

The employee said that, actually, this man had already been warned about numerous previous "inappropriate" pool incidents, all involving noticeable boners in his shorts. In one instance, he'd allegedly "ask(ed) for female ... staff to assist him" while his penis was erect. This was all problematic, the employee said, since more than half of pool-goers were women.

When the officer confronted the subject, the man said he was unaware of his erections (indeed quite possible, since he said he had a medical condition limiting feeling below his waist). The officer suggested he "be more mindful of his body and cover up when he notices he's erect," since further incidents could jeopardize his pool privileges. The man affirmed his understanding and left the pool for day by the Rec Center administration's request.

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