Pinocchio

Pinocchio

This live-action retelling of Carlo Collodi’s classic story about a marionette becoming a real boy is riddled with so many problems that even Blue Fairy and her magical powers could not fix them. Problem 1: It wasn’t pre-screened for critics, which is a big red flag in the entertainment business. Problem 2: The young wooden puppet is played by a middle-aged man with a receding hairline dressed in an ugly outfit with a 1960s wallpaper quality and topped off with a fuzzy cone-shaped hat as he prances around using non-puppet-like movements and expressions. Problem 3: The supposedly impressive and mystical Blue Fairy is a watered-down flat and passive character with just a pretty smile. Problem 4: The Italian dialogue is dubbed poorly in English with terrible casting choices of American celebrities like Regis Philbin and Cheech Marin providing the voices that are distracting and downright annoying. Problem 5: The film is rated G and is advertised as being a bright and cheery remake of the famous 1940 Disney animated film. However, there are many dark and disturbing scenes that kiddies will not enjoy, such as a lynch mob leaving the protagonist dangling from a noose in a dark forest. This list of problems is endless. Writer/director/star Roberto Benigni should wish upon an entire galaxy of stars in order for his film to generate any revenue, success or appeal.

Credits

Director:

  • Mark Gustafson

Writers:

  • Carlo Collodi
  • Gris Grimly
  • Guillermo Del Toro
  • Matthew Robbins
  • Patrick McHale

Producers:

  • Alexander Bulkley
  • Allison Abbate
  • Bill Johnson
  • Blanca Lista
  • Corey Campodonico
  • Dave Bogosian
  • Gary Ungar
  • Guillermo Del Toro
  • Jason Lust
  • Jim Seibel
  • Lisa Henson

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