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Hasbro gets another movie touting one of its products (along with Transformers and Battleship), and this is by far the worst, if that is even possible. Laine and Debbie (Olivia Cooke and Shelley Hennig) have been playing with a Ouija board since they were kids. Debbie plays solo in her house alone when they get older, and winds up dead, hanging herself with a string of plugged in Christmas lights that, mysteriously, don’t unplug under the stress of her weight pulling on them, but we won’t go into that right now. Laine and her friends start playing with the Ouija after Debbie’s death, and they discover that there are spirits living in Debbie’s house, and they had something to do with Debbie’s death. Maybe one of them pulled on the middle of the strand of Christmas lights while she was hanging herself, thus relieving some of the tension and preventing them from becoming unplugged? Oh wait, I’m sorry, I pledged not to go into that right now. The wannabe scares in the PG-13 outing consist of fake-outs and people behind doors, the kind of stuff you will see coming if you’ve seen, say, one horror movie in your lifetime. If that is in fact true, don’t make this your second one, for you will wind up massively disappointed.

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Portland Mercury Spirit Bored Ouija: Jump scare. Jump scare. Jump scare. Goodbye. by Courtney Ferguson 10/22/2014

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