AZ Presidential Candidates React To Newt's Win in South Carolina

We challenged the Project White House candidates to respond to the results of the South Carolina primary. Their responses—a bit delayed by some other breaking news in these parts—follow.

Green Richard Grayson:

Pinal County Greens Co-Chair & Presidential Candidate Richard Grayson Hails South Carolina Primary Results as a Victory for the Afro-Punk Movement


Apache Junction, Ariz., Jan. 21 —

Green Party presidential candidate Richard Grayson, co-chair of the Pinal County Greens, tonight hailed the results of the South Carolina Republican primary as "a tremendous victory for the Afro-Punk movement."

Grayson, watching the primary results on a 13" black-and-white cathode-ray television in a trailer park in nothern Pinal County, told his supporter that Newt Gingrich's resounding defeat of Mitt Romney can be attributed to South Carolinians' historical support of the Afro-Punk movement going back a dozen years.
"I would like to congratulate the Carolina Afro-Punks on their capturing the hearts and minds of Palmetto State Republicans," Grayson said. "As a queer Muslim Afro-Punk from the Barrio and with Janelle Monáe as my candidate for Vice President on the Green Party ticket, we are going to remake America for alternative urban kids everywhere!"

Republican Jim Terr:

January 22, 2012 Contact: Jim Terr c/o

Well, “reacts” might be too strong a word. But I have a couple thoughts about it:

Was there any surprise here? The guy with the most bravado and cleverness and presumed ability to out-argue President Obama in the general election, won. He successfully made Mitt Romney look awkward and unprepared and defensive about his undisclosed tax returns. Which he was. (Ooops, Mitt — who could have ever seen that one coming?)

Gingrich somehow overcame what might have been concern about his revolving-door lobbying and profiteering from a mobster named Freddie Mac, putting it off until the Dems hammer him with it in a couple months. On the question of his disgusting behavior in both his personal life and his political life, well, Evangelicals love a supposedly reformed sinner. Especially when he provides a stirringly righteous offensive defense, making himself look like a victim of the well-known liberal media.

As to the two who say what they think and are evidently unwilling to prostitute themselves to suit the rabidly anti-Obama, moralistic, right-wing electorate of South Carolina, Ron Paul and Rick Santorum, they, usurprisingly, didn’t do so well.

Terr made the following statement: “I have been a proud member of the Republican party, the party of my father (blessed be his memory) and a couple other people I know and like regardless, for 17 days, and it has been a thrilling ride. It has forced me to contemplate The Mind of the Republican, and to consider what it would take to bring us proud, lifelong Republicans back to the mainstream of American society.”

“In my campaign ( see website, ) I shall endeavor to combine the best of the ideas put forth by the other GOP candidates (well, Ron Paul had a good one on cutting back on US military adventures and Empire — I can’t think of any others right now), along with my own fanciful notions about Public Campaign Finance, repealing Citizens’ United, and nominating Supreme Court justices who are not ideologues and Tools of Industry, into a broadly appealing, grass-roots campaign.”

”I also affirm my core campaign promise that if nominated I will not run, and if I am elected I will not serve,” Terr added emphatically. “I love Arizona,” Terr lied blatantly, “And I am proud that we lesser-known candidates have a chance to make our voices heard here before the well-known national liberal news media.”

Terr refrained at this time from making any comments on his “alternative candidate” competitors on the Arizona ballot, though he claims to have a thick and incriminating dossier on each. “I prefer to run a positive campaign,” Terr exclaimed.

Republican Kip Dean:

With three separate candidates taking the first three states, none of the contenders has a convincing hold on the campaign. A contest that seemed won following New Hampshire is now at the point that it is anybody’s race.

Kip Dean a candidate in the Arizona Republican Primaries stated “So who do you choose the candidate that is ashamed to show his tax returns because of the monies that he has made in Washington’s legal insider trading or the Cotton Swab that routinely leaves his sick wives will preaching family values. Somebody else is who. These guys aren’t likeable.”

Kip Dean is running for President of the United States in the Arizona Republican Primaries. A businessman and a Washington outsider, he is running a moderate to liberal campaign in hopes to getting folks out to vote as this country needs a fair amount of healthy change.

Republican Charles Skelley:


Presidential Candidate Charles Skelley says the South Carolina primary did not affect his campaign.

Tucson AZ Jan 22, 2011 — US Presidential Candidate Charles Skelley says the results of the South Carolina primary have not altered his campaign plans. He vows to continue seeking nomination.

Skelley says that South Carolina voters did not raise the issue of Adam Smith's economics. Therefore the results of the South Carolina primary did not adequately reflect what the US needs in a President.

Green Gary Swing:

The outcome of South Carolina’s presidential primary has presented a mixed message for the American sheeple. On the positive side, the fact that Republican voters in Iowa, New Hampshire, and South Carolina each chose different primary partners shows that voters are ready for some variety in their electoral relationships. The victory of Newt Gingrich in South Carolina’s Republican primary has demonstrated that southern conservatives don’t believe in their own agenda of cultural warfare and intolerance. Moreover, the total lack of public interest in the race for the Democratic Party’s presidential nomination underscores the fact that voters are sick of having two similar corporate parties that offer no hope of real change. Looking forward to February 28, the state of Arizona is so tired of the Democrats mimicking the Republican Party’s right wing agenda, that they have chosen to not even bother with the nonsense of holding a Democratic presidential primary. I, for one, am pleased to have more than six million Arizona residents join me in saying good riddance to the Democrats! While a three way could be fun, this bodes well for a two-way race between the reactionary Republican Party’s nominee and a progressive Green Party candidate in November.

Although I am somewhat displeased with Newt Gingrich’s public support for genocide, I am heartened that he has surpassed Mormon candidate Mitt Romney with his bold stance rejecting the sanctity of marriage between one man and one woman. I applaud his idealism in asking the second of his three wives for an “open marriage” — even though he waited until the sixth year of his affair had passed before issuing his ultimatum of polyamory or divorce. Stephen Colbert, an unsuccessful candidate for president of the United States of South Carolina, made an interesting observation about Gingrich when he said: “At least he was enough of a gentleman to ask permission.” (Eventually.) As someone who has unsuccessfully pursued open relationships for more than 13 years, I share Gingrich’s apparent belief that polyamory is theoretically the ideal relationship model, even though it doesn’t work in practice. Each of us owns our own body, and we should be free to share it with any willing adults. I agree with George Bernard Shaw, who said that: “Confusing monogamy with morality has done more to destroy the conscience of the human race than any other error.” As the great sage Woody Allen once observed, “Sex between two people is a beautiful thing. Between five, it’s fantastic.”

Now that southern conservatives are willing to accept non-traditional relationships, I hope that we can finally lay the bogus issue of gays in the military to rest together. Can we all agree now that there is nothing wrong with people of the same gender loving one another? And perhaps there might be something wrong, however undefinable, about cheering for the mass murder of millions of darker-skinned people in impoverished nations, in the name of patriotism?

My invisible pink unicorn and I feel greatly unsettled by Newt Gingrich’s position that atheists should not hold public office. The notion that someone must pray to an imaginary entity in order to hold a position of power is patently absurd and inconsistent with a constitutional form of government. Separation of church and state is a defining principle of the United State of Arizona. Personally, I have a diverse background as a canonized Saint of the Universal Life Church, an ordained minister of the Church of Spiritual Humanism, and the son of a Presbyterian minister. Despite my deep and abiding faith that the Flying Spaghetti Monster created the universe, beer volcanoes, a midget, and a tree, I am willing to tolerate people who have not been touched by His noodly appendage. Can you say Ramen?

Republican Peter "Simon" Bollander:

The Masterminds Challenge the Two Top Republicans

Peter “Simon” Bollander, along with Charles Skelley of the Worlds Masterminds, challenge the top two candidates of the Republican party, Mitt Romney and Newt Gingrich, to a heated debate.

Bollander & Skelley, both unknown candidates of the Republican Party, plan to show the public why we are of the Masterminds & why over 70 percent of politicians are non productive.

Bollander & Skelley are in the process of administrating the green coalition. They will show why our great nation is going backwards with no forward motion in sight.

Politicians like Romney & Gingrich hamper progress by knowing only to create taxes along with legislation that creates unnecessary spending. We need creative scientific minds trained in economics, along with some business administration, to take charge.

We don't have that well-trained type mind in Congress. Over 60 percent of politicians in Washington have a Law background. It’s so easy to see why a lawyer with a community organizer background is running our country at the present. Do we see any creative programs for job creation? Of course not, for he doesn't know how to create jobs. He still lets China take the lead in manufacturing.

The answer is higher tariffs & create new industry with Green product line. We will show the Public that Romney & Gingrich are politicians who are taking our nation down the non-productive path.

The perfect example in leadership in which we need is the likes of the great Franklin Roosevelt. This is leadership of the best that all politicians should follow. He was trained in law but disliked this field. Was known for his deep passions for business practices. Here's one man who snuck through the cracks & became a great or greatest U.S President.

So therefore I’m calling for this professional debate to be named after this great man. The title would be The Franklin Roosevelt Presidential Debates.” The purpose wouild be to open up the doors for unknown candidates and then to expose candidates who lack in simple know-how "in how to get the country on the correct path."