Your Monday Morning News Update

-- Two Republican goober candidates think it's a good idea to criticize the Napster because she's single and has no children. Meanwhile, idiots like these Republican goober candidates keep breeding, creating a frightening future for the Earth.

-- The TPD is on the lookout for the killers of a southside convenience store clerk.

-- The space shuttle Discovery is back, safe and sound.

-- Things still suck in the Middle East.

-- And finally, Tucson's not the only place in this great land of ours that's really friggin' hot.