Friday, May 25, 2018

Zari Needs a Home

Posted By on Fri, May 25, 2018 at 4:13 PM

Hi, my name is Zari!

I am a 2-year-old girl who is looking for the purr-fect home! I love attention and will thank you with many purrs. My dream home would have a scratching post just for me! In the past I have done well with other cats.

Come fall in love with me at HSSA Main Campus at 635 W. Roger Rd. You can also give an adoptions counselor a call at 520-327-6088, ext. 173.

Many Purrs,
Zari (855139)

T.H.R.E.A.T. Watch: It's Getting Real

Posted By on Fri, May 25, 2018 at 3:32 PM

This is getting real. It's getting realer by the day.

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Thursday, May 24, 2018

Laughing Stock: Quiñones' Creeper Rides High

Posted By on Thu, May 24, 2018 at 1:00 PM

Frankie Quiñones is at Laff's on June 3.
  • Frankie Quiñones is at Laff's on June 3.

Best known for the breakout “Cholofit” videos on his YouTube channel “The Funny Drop,” San Francisco comedian Frankie Quiñones comes to Laff’s Comedy Caffe on Sunday, June 3, courtesy of, Chad Lehrman’s new website promoting our town’s expanding comedy scene.

Quiñones’ stand-up set inspired Saturday Night Live auteur Lorne Michaels to recruit him to the Más Mejor lineup of Michaels’ production company, Broadway Video. “The Funny Drop” chronicles the cholo life of Creeper, a cross between Noel Gugliemi, Richard Simmons and Mister Rogers.

“Creeper's a positive character,” says Quiñones. “A lot of times cholo culture is associated with gangbangers, but (Creeper is) trying to get people safe, to get in touch with their spirit.”

A cholo's look may represent a legacy of badassery, but Quiñones says that in real life, they take care of their families and communities. Their vehicle of choice is the low rider; their language is a kind of Spanglish version of hip hop flow. And the lifestyle has spread wide from its Southwestern U.S. origins. “In Japan it's huge,” Quiñones says, recalling his tour stops there. “They have a whole cholo culture. They embrace the whole low-rider scene.”

Creeper and other Quiñones characters, like the popular Juanita Carmelita, are based on his family. As himself, he’s appeared on Comedy Central, Nickelodeon, and Funny Or Die.

“Standup is my first love,” Quiñones says. “I've been doing (it) for 11 years, but now I come onstage three times. I do my standup as myself, and then I come up as Juanita and the Creeper.”

The show is at 7 p.m., Sunday, June 3; age 21+. Tickets are $20 via or at 520-247-0988. There’s a two-item minimum.

Local Jokels

Tucson Improv Movement now serves beer and wine. Special shows for Memorial Day weekend include gubernatorial candidate Kelly Fryer in The Soapbox at 9 p.m., May 25 and executive directors of TIM and Unscrewed Theater competing in the Game Show Show at 7:30 p.m., May 26. Comedy at the Wench celebrates its second anniversary at 9 p.m., Monday, May 28, with Phoenix comedian Leslie Barton and top locals Monte Benjamin, Chris Thayer, Matt Ziemak, Rory Monserrat, Steena Salildo, Aaron Panther and Kristofer Royer. The Mint’s Tuesday open mic closes until fall after the 9 p.m., May 29 show reprising Kristine Levine’s Critical Comedy,d in which she critiques comedians’ sets. Clint Lapsansky’s Monday open mic at The Garage is now at 9 p.m.  Dogs are welcome.

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The Weekly List: 19 Things To Do In Tucson This Week

Posted By on Thu, May 24, 2018 at 9:59 AM

Your Weekly guide to keeping busy in the Old Pueblo.


Sun Records: A Million Dollar Story. They say you can’t teach an old dog new tricks, but you can certainly have Old Tucson put on a brand new show, written especially for everyone’s favorite Wild West attraction. Michael Monroe Goodman’s show is all about the record label that brought the world rock ’n’ roll, by being the first to record artists like Johnny Cash, Elvis Presley and Jerry Lee Lewis. If you’re not All Shook Up with excitement about this show, you should be! This is the first in a trio of shows which will include a Marty Robbins tribute in June and an Everly Brothers show in September. If you buy all your tickets at once, you can use the promo code ALL3 to avoid paying three separate online convenience fees. Dinner at 6 p.m. and show at 7 p.m. on Saturday, May 26. Old Tucson, 201 S. Kinney Road. $48.95 includes the price of dinner.

Terry Fator. Whether you’re into the fine art of ventriloquism or not, Terry Fator has a pretty cute little story of how he got so famous. He got his first dummy when he was in fifth grade, and spent years and years in a band and performing as a ventriloquist at county fairs. One time he performed for the ONE person who showed up in a 1,000 seat venue. Then, of course, he won season 2 of “America’s Got Talent,” and skyrocketed to success, along with his cast of characters, including the little girl with the big voice, the Impersonating Turtle, the Elvis Impersonator and the annoying neighbor. How does he do it? No one knows—his lips are sealed. Doors 7 p.m., show 8 p.m. Saturday, May 26. Desert Diamond Casino, 1100 W. Pima Mine Road. $35 to $70.

John Philip Sousa in the Park. The Tucson Pops Orchestra is seeing off Memorial Day weekend with a tribute to the good ol’ American March King. Sousa, or JP to his friends, wrote such bangers as “The Stars and Stripes Forever,” “Semper Fidelis” and “The Liberty Bell,” all of which you’ve heard even if the names don’t sound familiar. (As a side note, Sousa also wrote three novels, and was a fantastic trapshooter.) At this event, you’ll hear just one piece by Sousa, and then a smattering of compositions including “Hymn to the Fallen” and “America the Beautiful.” You’ll also see the world premiere of “Fairy Tale, an Imaginary Ballet,” by composer Pete Fine. 7 p.m. Sunday, May 27. DeMeester Outdoor Performance Center at Reid Park, 900 S. Randolph Way. Free—but BYOFSOB (Bring Your Own Folding Chair Or Blanket).

The Wizard of Oz. If you were off to see the Wizard, the Wonderful Wizard of Oz, what would you ask him for? To keep net neutrality safe? To have all the potholes in your neighborhood fixed? Or something simple, like an eegees now that it’s getting hot? You’d better get your answer ready for when you go to see the Academy of Ballet, Tap and Jazz Dance School’s presentation of The Wizard of Oz. Dancers of all ages will be dancing down the yellow brick road, past the flying monkeys and through the Emerald City. It sounds like it’s going to be totally wicked. 2 p.m. Sunday, May 27. Tucson Convention Center Music Hall, 260 S. Church Ave. $16.

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Wednesday, May 23, 2018

The Evolution and Devolution of Diane Douglas

Posted By on Wed, May 23, 2018 at 4:00 PM


The Evolution and Devolution of Diane Douglas, short version:
In 2014, Diane Douglas was the Republican Tea-Party/Wingnut Education Superintendent candidate from hell. But when she was elected, she evolved into a higher form of herself. She became a do-no-harm official who made an creditable effort at learning on the job and working in a nonpartisan manner for Arizona's teachers and students. Then came Trump's candidacy, which tapped into Douglas' inner wing nut. She's been in a devolutionary slide ever since. A second Douglas term could turn out to be as bad as I feared the first would be. Donald Trump/Betsy DeVos bad. Or worse, since she's closer.

The longer version:
My colleagues and I at Blog for Arizona had a hand in Diane Douglas' winning the 2014 Republican primary. We outed then-Superintendent John Huppenthal's compulsion for writing anonymous comments on blog posts ranging from scattered-but-reasonable to loopy to downright racist. When his anonymous comments made it to the mainstream media, Huppenthal's campaign crashed and burned. Good riddance, I thought. We should be able to defeat Douglas.

Douglas leaned way, way right. An example. When she served on the Peoria School Board, Douglas said she "vehemently opposed" the International Baccalaureate program because its "goal is to promote world government." During the campaign, she was nearly incoherent in interviews and refused to talk to reporters. Her most in-depth interview was with recalled senator and virulent racist Russell Pearce. She stayed out of urban Arizona, spending her time in small towns.

In the general, Douglas lost both Pima and Maricopa counties, yet she managed to eke out a win. I was certain when she took office, she would adopt the racial animus of her predecessors, Horne and Huppenthal, and plunk a pile of soggy teabags on top of their mess.

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Saving the Sanctuary: Tucson City Council Pushes for Historic Status for Midtown Benedictine Monastery as Development Battle Intensifies

Posted By on Wed, May 23, 2018 at 3:03 PM

The high-rise buildings that developers wanted to build around the Benedictine Monastery, represented in the architects' renderings, has been halted by the Tucson City Council seeking Historic Landmark designation. - COURTESY PHOTO
  • courtesy photo
  • The high-rise buildings that developers wanted to build around the Benedictine Monastery, represented in the architects' renderings, has been halted by the Tucson City Council seeking Historic Landmark designation.

Tucson City Councilmember Steve Kozachik is taking a new tack in the battle over the future of the midtown Benedictine Monastery.

Kozachik initiated a process that could give the monastery a Historic Landmark designation, which the City Council unanimously approved during a May 22 study session. The Historic Landmark designation would protect it from being torn down and create added guidlines about what types of developments can surround it.

“The building remains one of the last expressions of this architectural style in the Tucson area,” Kozachik wrote in his proposal for the Council. “It has been a cultural, architectural and spiritual landmark in Tucson since 1940.”

Local architect Roy Place developed the monastery for the Benedictine Sisters of Perpetual Adoration 80 years ago, in his signature Spanish Revival style. The sisters sold the monastery to local developer Ross Rulney in September 2016 for $5.9 million.

Before the sisters sold the monastery, they put it on the National Registry of Historic Places, thinking that would protect it from demolition. The certification is framed, hanging on the wall of the monastery. But the national registry doesn’t protect the historic structure—it’s purely honorific.

The current zoning in that area is for offices and high-density residential—aka student housing. There’s also a maximum 222 living units and a 40-foot height, or about four stories. There’s no restrictions against tearing down historic structures and no requirement for neighborhood participation or design review.

Architects for the project, Poster Frost Mirto, Inc., said at a March community meeting that they were helping Rulney develop the site and making sure the monastery is protected. It would be the seventh Roy Place creation Poster Frost Mirto, Inc. has worked to preserve.

Together, the architects and developer proposed the Historic Landmark designation, but in exchange, the city would have to allow Rulney to build higher than 40 feet around the monastery and expand the number of allowed apartments or condos. As part of the deal, Rulney would agree to prohibit renting by the bedroom—the typical student-rental arrangement—and to hold several reviews for public input.

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Monday, May 21, 2018

I Know I Said I Wouldn't Give Teachers Advice, But . . .

Posted By on Mon, May 21, 2018 at 4:14 PM

During the #RedforEd walkouts, I wrote a post saying educators were doing just fine without my advice, and this retired teacher wasn't about to "old man" them. Yeah, well. Don't call this advice then. Call it what I would do if I were in the teachers' place. Except it might not be what I would do if I were in their place. So let's call it a suggestion worth every penny the teachers are paying for it.

I would love to see teachers around the state demand that the 9+1 percent pay hike the legislature built into the budget be shared with everyone in the school community, except administrators, who already receive a reasonable salary.

Would I agree with myself if I were currently an Arizona teacher looking at a raise which doesn't bring me up to the salary I should be making, and doesn't take into consideration the reparations (raise-parations?) I deserve for the years my wage was way below the national average? I don't know. I might have to be talked into it, and even then . . .

With all that in mind, here's why I think teachers should share the raise, coming from someone who doesn't have a dog-eared dollar bill in the hunt.

Teacher wages are bad. Support staff wages are worse. While the legislature earmarked some new money for teachers, it cheated non-teaching staff out of the much-needed raise which was one of the #RedforEd demands.

If teachers sacrificed some of their raise to make up for the legislature stiffing the rest of the staff, it would send a powerful message. It would say, "We're demonstrating the respect we have for the people who work beside us. We understand the value they add to our children's educations." The move would foster unity across the school community in the struggle to achieve full funding for Arizona education. If teachers are willing to share the raise with other staff members, it encourages everyone to share the burden during the political campaign season, at voting time and, if necessary, during a walkout next year.

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Cinema Clips: Cargo

Posted By on Mon, May 21, 2018 at 11:00 AM

I’ve had it up to here with zombies (I stopped watching The Walking Dead after Season 2), but this genre film, set in the Australian Outback is actually pretty good. Martin Freeman stars as a man surviving a zombie apocalypse on a houseboat with his wife and baby daughter. Things go very badly not long after the movie starts, and he must battle to survive on land to ensure a future for his family.

Directors Ben Howling and Yolanda Ramke (who also wrote the screenplay) keep the origins of the apocalypse shrouded in secrecy and that’s a good move. There are cool elements, like government provided survival (and disposal) packs for those who become infected, and the fact that Freeman has a baby strapped to his back during a rather harrowing medical emergency. The film relies more upon its sense of dread and impending doom rather than straight-up zombie violence. The humans who aren’t sick turn out to be a lot scarier than the ghouls.

The movie is more The Road than Dawn of the Dead, and Freeman’s stellar work makes it worth seeing, even if you’ve had your fill of flesh eaters.

Streaming on Netflix.

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Popular Content

  1. T.H.R.E.A.T. Watch: It's Getting Real (The Range: The Tucson Weekly's Daily Dispatch)
  2. The Weekly List: 19 Things To Do In Tucson This Week (The Range: The Tucson Weekly's Daily Dispatch)
  3. Laughing Stock: Quiñones' Creeper Rides High (The Range: The Tucson Weekly's Daily Dispatch)
  4. Cinema Clips: Cargo (The Range: The Tucson Weekly's Daily Dispatch)
  5. The Weekly List: 23 Things To Do In Tucson This Week (The Range: The Tucson Weekly's Daily Dispatch)

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