Friday, September 4, 2009

Onion Exclusive: Arizona Wildcats Freshman Point Guard Already Calling School 'Zona'

Posted By on Fri, Sep 4, 2009 at 10:38 PM

A Wildcat basketball news brief you won't see anywhere besides The Onion:

TUCSON, AZ—In an effort to impress his new University of Arizona teammates, Wildcats freshman point guard Lamont Jones was already referring to the school as "Zona" after his very first practice, sources reported Tuesday. "I waited until I was halfway through junior year to start calling the school Zona," senior guard Nic Wise told reporters. "For Lamont to come in here and start saying 'Zona this' and 'Zona that' like it's no big deal—that's just spitting in the face of everyone who came before him. Zona is a privilege, not a right." Wildcats sources later confirmed that, while dining in the student union, Jones twice referred to the team as the "Sun Devils."

Comments

Subscribe to this thread:

Add a comment

Previously in the Range

More by Jim Nintzel

Today | Thu | Fri | Sat | Sun | Mon | Tue
Guided Tea Tasting

Guided Tea Tasting @ Seven Cups

Fridays, 3-3:30 p.m.

All of today's events | Staff Picks

Staff Pick

Jurassic Park

This pulse-pounding thrill-ride that made the whole world go dino-crazy scaring the living beejeesus out of moviegoers… More

@ Loft Cinema Fri., Oct. 20, 10-11:45 p.m. and Sat., Oct. 21, 10-11:45 p.m. 3233 E. Speedway Blvd.

» More Picks

Submit an Event Listing

Popular Content

  1. Results-Based Funding: The Transition From Test Scores To School Grades (The Range: The Tucson Weekly's Daily Dispatch)
  2. The Weekly List: 24 Things To Do In Tucson This Week (The Range: The Tucson Weekly's Daily Dispatch)
  3. Let's Listen To That Awesome New Calexico Single (The Range: The Tucson Weekly's Daily Dispatch)
  4. Koch Brothers Infiltrate Pima County Schools With a High School Econ Course (The Range: The Tucson Weekly's Daily Dispatch)
  5. Better Late Than Never: 1968 Film Makes World Premiere (The Range: The Tucson Weekly's Daily Dispatch)

© 2017 Tucson Weekly | 7225 Mona Lisa Rd. Ste. 125, Tucson AZ 85741 | (520) 797-4384 | Powered by Foundation