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Film Clips
Reviews by Gene Armstrong, James DiGiovanna and Linsay Hernon.
BALLISTIC: ECKS VS SEVER. Director Kaos (short for his real name, Wych Kaosayananda) must have sensed the chemistry, or at least the photogenic appeal, of hottie actors Lucy Liu and Antonio Banderas when they appeared together in the 1999 boxing picture Play It to the Bone. Because they look really sexy in this new all-action film, which itself has an unwieldy mouthful of a name. And it's a misleading one, too. Ecks (Banderas) and Sever (Liu) are globetrotting ultra-spies who merely start out battling each other, each assuming the other is responsible for their respective missing loved ones. They soon realize they must work together to fight a common enemy (Gregg Henry) who purposely has pitted them against each other. Wild and wooly martial-arts action--Banderas and Liu trained extensively in preparation--and lots of pyrotechnic destruction can't mask that there's little in the way of story. Just two great-looking performers wearing black and kicking some butt. If that's your cuppa, drink up. --Armstrong
BANGER SISTERS. Screenwriter Bob Dolman (Far and Away, Willow) directs his first feature in this tale of two middle-aged women--played with professional skill and endless heart by Goldie Hawn and Susan Sarandon--and their clumsy but earnest reunion after 20 years apart. The catch is that the two women are ex-groupies from the 1970s, and now they couldn't be more different from each other. Hawn's character is still a rocker who, after losing her bartending job in a L.A. hard-rock nightclub, drives her El Camino to Phoenix to discover that Sarandon's character has become a gated-community soccer mom whose husband and kids are oblivious to her past. Geoffrey Rush bums a ride as an obsessive-compulsive writer traveling to the Valley of the Sun to commit fratricide--really. After some uncomfortable, fish-out-of-water interludes for both women, touching sisterly bonding ensues. Dolman's got a decent outline for a promising movie here, but he neglected to flesh out his character sketches with credible pathos. --Armstrong
BARBERSHOP. Homespun values, respect for community and the sturdiness of habit are emphasized in this new comedy-drama in which rapper-actor Ice Cube plays Calvin, a South Chicago fellow who inherits the titular business from his dad, initially finds it lacking in the hipness department, sells it to a shady street character, and then spends the rest of the movie trying to get the place back. Comedian Cedric the Entertainer (The Original Kings of Comedy) co-stars as the senior tonsorial technician, expounding on every subject under the sun, including those he doesn't know a thing about; his 'do, by the way, is a delightful sailboat of hair. Sean Patrick Thomas (Save the Last Dance) and chart-topping rapper Eve also contribute respectable jobs in this warm-hearted tale of life in the old-school neighborhood. It's sweet and non-threatening; following his stoner comedies and action-film roles, it marks a pleasant change of pace for Cube. --Armstrong
BLUE CRUSH. Would it be too hokey to call this entertaining final-days-of-summer flick as refreshing as a face full of sea mist? Maybe, but so be it. Not unlike a Gidget Goes Girl Power, this charmingly modest film--directed by John Stockwell, on the heels of his Crazy/Beautiful--concerns three surfing pals who live for the waves and who just happen to be young, attractive women. Budding blonde star of the moment Kate Bosworth plays Anne Marie, who hangs 10 with roomies Michelle Rodriquez (Girlfight) and Sanoe Lake. Tucson actress Mika Boorem plays Anne Marie's little sister. The Maui-based wave-crashing action is exciting and photogenic, and, duh, so are the women. Amid this summer of high-tech chases, big-time explosions and record-breaking box office, the fact that the major plot conflict in this movie comes down to something as simple and dramatic as a surfing contest is, well, refreshing. --Armstrong
CITY BY THE SEA. It's the compelling cop drama of NYPD Blue without the bare butts and shaky camera work, and the dysfunctional family of Roseanne without the controversial comedienne and her gyrating voice in this intense and witty biopic of Vincent LaMarca based on a 1997 Esquire Magazine article by Pulitzer Prize winner, Michael McAlay. Robert DeNiro stars as, you guessed it, a New York homicide detective whose troubled past catches up with him when the prime suspect in a murder case turns out to be his drug-addicted, street-walking estranged son (James Franco). Director Michael Caton-Jones skillfully juxtaposes a decadent family with a deteriorated city, as one steadily is restored while the other continues on its downward spiral. City by the Sea is a movie you must sea. --Hernon
FOUR FEATHERS. Following at least five earlier films of the titular Victorian novel by A.E.W. Mason, The Four Feathers has the ingredients of a sweeping, old-fashioned epic, including starched-lip British soldiers bonding in richly brocaded English ball scenes and over brutal violence in the Sudan. Directed by Shekhar Kapur (Elizabeth), it obsessively explores traditional concepts of honor, bravery and friendship, adding a juicy love triangle for spice. The cast includes attractive young performers such as Heath Ledger, Wes Bentley and Kate Hudson, managing not to embarrass themselves. But, as a result of a perfunctory script, supremely sloppy editing and a lack of overall vision, nothing in the picture seems to hang together. One thing just happens after another, and how we get from there to here seems to be missing. But Aussie heartthrob Ledger, as conflicted hero Harry Feversham, looks very cool and almost Jesus-like in Lawrence of Arabia mode: long hair and beard, dirty face and a turban. --Armstrong
MY BIG FAT GREEK WEDDING. Do you, preppy and traditional English teacher, take this former frumpy but always-quirky waitress to be your lawfully wedded wife? I do. And do you, newly transformed va-va-vavoom travel agent, take this still preppy and traditional English teacher to be your lawfully wedded husband? I do. Then by the powers vested in me, I now pronounce you husband and wife. If only it were that simple. When the bride is from an enormously proud Greek family that lives in a mini replica of the Parthenon complete with Corinthian columns and adorning statues where the father believes Windex is the almighty cure-all, the senile grandmother believes that the Turks are after her, and the food-loving mother believes that a baptism in an inflatable kiddie pool will fix everything, a marriage is a little more complicated. Writer and star, Nia Vardalos, shows these eccentric dilemmas and peculiar problems in this charming comedy that will tickle your heart until death do you part. --Hernon
ONE HOUR PHOTO. A visual stunning movie about visual imagery, One Hour Photo tells the tell of Sy Parrish, who lives only to develop photographs. Sy becomes obsessed with the Yorkins, a young family whose snapshots indicate perfect happiness. When he finds that the reality behind their Kodak moments is not all it's cracked up to be, Sy himself cracks up a bit, and things spiral into super-creepville. Shockingly, Sy is extremely well played by the normally notoriously annoying Robin Williams. Even more shocking, this beautiful, understated film is directed by a guy whose only previous work was a bunch of Madonna and Nine Inch Nails videos. By placing many of the important thematic elements in the style and color of the visual compositions, director Mark Romanek makes the best possible use of cinema. Though there are a few false notes, and the story isn't terribly ambitious, this is an extremely compelling first film, and is, so far, one of the year's best. --DiGiovanna
read my lips. The tense action of a hard-boiled crime film is grafted to an arty investigation into the human condition and mundane everyday life in this new French thriller by writer-director Jacques Audiard (Venus Beauty Institute). Carla (Emmanuelle Devos) is a partially-deaf office drone who hires as her assistant the kinda hunky ex-con Paul (Vincent Cassel, most memorable from last year's Brotherhood of the Wolf). When Paul discovers Carla can read lips, he starts hatching a devious plot, and she is surprisingly willing to participate. The slowly escalating action inevitably leads to double-crosses, beat-downs and murder. Always surprising and engrossing, Read My Lips will remind some viewers of--and can hold its own against--the spirited carelessness of Jean-Luc Godard's Breathless and the mean dirty-dealing of John Dahl's The Last Seduction. Highly recommended. --Armstrong
REIGN OF FIRE. The last few humans on Earth battle fire-breathing dragons in England in the year 2020. Along with massive computer-animated dragons--with the attendant nitro-napalm expectoration--this flick also boasts a decrepit castle, tanks, a helicopter, automatic weapons, fist fights, heavy artillery, horse stunts, underground tunnels, motorcycles, computer-imaging tchochtkes, extreme sky-diving, crossbow arrows with explosive points and a bona fide medieval battle ax. Christian Bale, Matthew McConaughey and Izabella Scorupco add a homo sapiens element to all the hardware, which is admirably wrangled by X-Files director Rob Bowman. Comic relief, in the form of not-unpleasant quips in the face of danger, is provided by a charming Gerard Butler. Can you guess whom the dragons toast first? Call it a guilty pleasure if you must. But at its heart, this is a way-cool example of escapist sci-fi and fantasy. --Armstrong
SCOOBY-DOO. The Damsel in Distress Daphne dons her fully accessorized designer clothing; the egocentric Fred fosters his all-female fan club; the four-eyed Velma spouts her brainiac theories; and the food-obsessed duo Shaggy and Scooby-Doo dodge gruesome ghouls in search of anything edible as they all rev up the Mystery Machine and head to Spooky Island Amusement Park to solve The Ludicrous Case of the Brainwashing Green-eyed, Overgrown Gremlin, Protoplasm Snatchers in this outrageous insult to Scooby-Doo fans everywhere. Zoinks! First of all, you would have hoped that the special effects crew would have gotten a clue from George Lucas, or even George Clooney for that matter, on how to blend CGI and live-action with any sense of credibility. And, the real jaw-dropping stab in the back is the outlandish conclusion to the already insipid plot of entranced Generation X-ers and bald and tattooed Temple of Doom voodoo lords. Director Raja Gosnell and the handful of writers should have eaten a lot more Scooby Snacks before making this film. --Hernon
SERVING SARA. There's the great and compelling movie you'd rush to theaters to see immediately. Then there is the mediocre one that sparks a hint of interest, but you'd rather wait to see it when it's released on video. And then there is the rather pathetic movie that you'd only watch if you were completely bored, had nothing better to do, and it just happened to be airing on cable TV. Well, this cat and mouse hodgepodge by director Reginald Hudlin is one of those cable TV losers. Matthew Perry stars as the Chandler Bing of James Bondian process servers whose wannabe suave and intensity is as real and convincing as Pamela Anderson's breasts. However, the Friend's performance is at least more forgiving than the exceedingly bouncy and bubbly trophy wife of an adulterous cattle rancher, played by Elizabeth Hurley, who needs her own set of pompoms to make her overzealous cheerleader-esque personality complete. Together the two misfits team up and become entangled in juvenile competitions, monster truck rallies and impotent bulls as they play Who Can Deliver the Divorce Papers First. Writing duo Jay Scherick and David Ronn collaborate on the screenplay for I Spy, due out later this year, which does not bode well for that TV series adaptation after the likes of this big screen disaster. --Hernon
SIGNS. M. Night Shyamalan delivers a gorgeously filmed family drama with a witty script and a tight, suspenseful plot. How did he do it? He took all the money that Hollywood was throwing at him, and he decided not to spend it on special effects. Instead, he makes the best and most careful use of camera possible, he trained his actors into a weird and mannered style that is both creepy and funny, and he spent some time writing a script that focuses on plot and dialogue instead of explosions and gadgets. It's not a deep film, nor will it challenge your conceptions of faith and self and love. What it is, more than anything, is a well-done version of a 1950s ultra-low-budget sci-fi/horror film. Still, well-done anything beats half-baked and over-priced hands down. --DiGiovanna
SPIDER-MAN. ... Or, as I like to call it Spider-Man 1. The plot for this one is familiar to every 35-year-old virgin: unlucky ectomorph Peter Parker (Tobey Maguire) is bitten by a genetically modified spider and gains the ability to star in a major motion picture. Somehow, though, being super strong and wearing a pretty pair of tights is not enough to secure him the love Mary Jane Parker (Kirsten Dunst), the cutest girl in school and the only person in Parker's peer group who doesn't make extra loogies just to spit at him. The special effects in this one are very special indeed, with what is perhaps the best super-battle in the history of cinema. On the other hand, every now and again the script slows way, way down for some embarrassing expository dialogue, and Willem Dafoe is a bit bathetic as Spider-Man's arch-nemesis The Green Goblin. But then, you aren't going for the dialogue, are you? --DiGiovanna
SPY KIDS 2: THE ISLAND OF LOST DREAMS. The Cortez family is back in action as writer-director Robert Rodriguez (Desperado) stands to make a bundle from this second installment in his family-oriented espionage-action franchise. This time, Carmen and Juni (Alexa Vega and Daryl Sabara) are off to the titular isle where they find mutated animals and a Dr. Moreau-type mad scientist (Steve Buscemi). Their goal? Save the world from an energy crisis, I think. The plot tends to take a back seat to the gadget-heavy action. In fact, Rodriguez seems to have made up for the slim story with lots of cool bells and whistles in the form of computer-generated effects. Carmen and Juni bicker and cooperate with the charm of real siblings, though. And you can't help but appreciate the Latino heroes whether pint-size or grown-up--it should be noted that the gorgeous Cortez parents (Antonio Banderas, Carla Gugino) return with their star appeal, as well. --Armstrong
STAR WARS: ATTACK OF THE CLONES. This movie is exactly ten times better than the last Star Wars, which is to say that it sucks. Mostly, it's just footnotes for the next Star Wars film, so if you're one of those hardcore geeks who likes to memorize every detail about some science-fiction universe, then you'll really dig the endless expository dialogue and convoluted plotting of this film. On the plus side, there's some cool fighting sequences featuring Yoda and Samuel L. Jackson as Mace Windu. Although the fact that Sam Jackson is the only black guy in the movie kind of makes me wonder what Lucas means by "the dark side of the force." Anyway, the cool action sequences come only after nearly two hours of "that sucks," so they're hardly worthwhile, but maybe you could sneak into the end of Star Wars after giving your money to some more worthwhile cinematic venture, like that Pauly Shore comeback movie, or that Worst of Steven Spielberg retrospective. --DiGiovanna
STEALING HARVARD. Remember Dog Park, Superstar, or even Dick? Didn't think so. Well, director Bruce McColloch was responsible for those easily forgettable catastrophes as well as for this latest cinematic shortcoming that earns the futile filmmaker yet another failing grade. But at least his track record is still intact, right? Jason Lee stars in a wasted effort as a pitiful worker bee at his father-in-law's medical supply factory and has finally saved enough money to buy his first home with his gift basket-making girlfriend. However, his free-spirited trailer-trash sister with Peg Bundy hair (Megan Mullally) reminds her absentminded sibling of his promise to pay his niece's college tuition, which just so happens to be the same amount as his hard-earned nest egg. Just when the film couldn't get any worse, it does when the unfunny funny-man, Tom Green, steps in as the pathetic landscape architect with an obnoxious sense of humor. He manages to attract lonely widowed judges with kinky sex fetishes and gun-wielding liquor store clerks while trying to swindle a cool 30 grand for his needy friend. With the erudition of Hollywood's fall term underway, it is a mystery as to why dumb summer flicks such as this have graduated to the next grade, and why Freddy Got Fingered's leading man hasn't flunked out yet. --Hernon
STUART LITTLE 2. He plays soccer. He drives classy convertibles. He flies model airplanes. And, he's just a 3-inch tall mouse dressed in designer clothing. That's right, Stuart Little (voiced by Michael J. Fox) is back as the cute and cuddly computer-animated critter, and he's brought along a few new friends to share his latest adventure in director Rob Minkoff's follow-up to his 1999 original. When evil Falcon (voiced by James Woods) uses an innocent pawn to steal Mrs. Little's (Geena Davis) wedding ring, our hero scales skyscrapers and journeys on garbage barges to retrieve the diamond ring and to rescue the damsel in distress (voiced by Melanie Griffith). Besides the obvious mystery as to what a bird will do with expensive jewelry and the overtly corny Father Knows Best family, the fun new editions to the cast, the charming entertainment of the original characters and the convincing special effects allows Minkoff to pull off a sequel that actually works. --Hernon
SWIMFAN. This silly little stalker drama for the teen set finds Erika Christensen (the Julia Stiles look-alike from Traffic) playing Madison, the new girl on a high-school campus who fixes her femme-fatale eyes on the school's top jock, Ben--a swimming champion of all things--played by Jesse Bradford (Clockstoppers, Bring It On). Under the guise of being assertive and independent and modern, Madison gets away with being a bad girl to the extreme. The character shares much in terms of overt sexuality and latent threat with Glenn Close's frizzy-haired witch in Fatal Attraction. But if you can imagine it, Swimfan is even more exploitative than that "classic." Nevertheless, it was the No. 1 movie its first weekend out, which says a lot for the slowness of the fall movie season and the lowest-common-denominator tastes of the audience. Next, please. --Armstrong
TRAPPED. When filmmakers do not show an advanced screening for critics, it is usually because they realize the true Ed Wood quality of their product, as was the case with box office dud Autumn in New York. However, with the recent real-life onslaught of child abductions, Columbia Pictures chose to avoid the pre-release of director Luis Mandoki's film adaptation of Greg Iles' novel entitled 24 Hours, which portrays a fictionalized kidnapping of a young girl, played by Dakota Fanning. With just the right amount of eerie creepiness, Kevin Bacon plays a good bad guy in the role of the wicked snatcher who has a dual motive of deep-seeded revenge and twisted family counselor charging $250,000 per day. But his performance may be the only redeeming quality of the action thriller since Stuart Townsend makes a feeble attempt to make light of the improper casting choice as the upper class anesthesiologist. The shaky hand-held camera work leaves you screaming for Excedrin at the end of the 99 minutes, with Courtney Love's hairdresser all together failing to finish the job. In the end, the high stake finale succumbs to utter absurdity. Whatever the real reason was for a failed pre-screening opportunity, it's a shame that I couldn't warn you off from this film that is trapped in Ed Wood quality. --Hernon
THE TUXEDO. Why, oh why, do American producers insist on tossing Jackie Chan (a martial arts superstar and estimable comedian in his own right) over and over into a series of annoying buddy pictures? It's the money, stupid! With Chris Tucker in Rush Hour and Owen Wilson in Shaghai Noon, Chan has built two formidable franchises in which the impressiveness of the martial arts action (Wow Factor) decreases in direct proportion to the amount of inane situational humor (Groan Factor). The makers of The Tuxedo can't even decide who's supposed to be Chan's instantly marketable buddy. First, it's Jason Isaacs as Chan's boss, a Brit secret agent named Clark Devlin and whose tux contains hidden powers. When Devlin gets knocked out for a few days and Chan dons the monkey suit, it's Jennifer Love Hewitt as a junior-grade spy who thinks Chan is Devlin. They must foil an evil billionaire who wants to--more with the groans--poison the world's water supply. And since when does Chan need invisible wires and camera effects to do his stunts --Armstrong
XXX. Admit it: Whenever you see or hear the title of this new flick--showcasing ultra-buff Vin Diesel as extreme-athlete-turned-secret-agent Xander Cage--you half hope it refers to the rating. No such luck. In this film by Rob Cohen (who directed Diesel in last year's hot-rod spectacular The Fast and the Furious), X Games collide with a James Bond for the '00s. Stunt fans will love this picture, in which Diesel does such things as ride a metal tray down a handrail, flee from snowmobiles on a snowboard and has a fire fight in a bona fide castle. The story has something to do with some rogue Russian soldiers starting a terrorist team in the Czech Republic. The exotic locations, including some nice views of Prague, are a plus. Super-bad Samuel L. Jackson and eye candy Asia Argento add to the movie's appeal. As for Diesel, he couldn't be more Diesel: all fueled up and with everywhere to go. Action-film fans could do worse than this. --Armstrong
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