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Film Clips
Reviews by Gene Armstrong, Diane Daly, James DiGiovanna and Linsay Hernon.
13 CONVERSATIONS ABOUT ONE THING. What brings you happiness? A loving marriage? A $2 million winning lottery ticket? A successful law practice? A dime-bag of heroin? Or maybe plump garden tomatoes? For the ensemble cast of characters in writer/director Jill Sprecher's slow-paced dialogue-driven drama, these things are their sources of personal solace and joy. However, life isn't all skipping through the dandelion-speckled meadows on a sunny afternoon since sadness and hardship can propagate just as quickly and easily. You could be a victim of a hit and run like Clea Duvall's character, or lose your wife due to an illicit love affair like John Turturro's character. Is this due to fate or does everything occur because of mere serendipity? Now, just because this film is charged with poignant thought-provoking questions doesn't mean that you should see it. So, simply read this review, sit back and contemplate the issues, and skip the monotonous boredom brought to you by Ms. Clockwatchers. --Hernon
AUSTIN POWERS GOLDMEMBER. Sadly, I didn't take any notes while watching the latest installment of this mock superspy series. Normally, that wouldn't have mattered, but since there was nothing memorable about this film it left me in a bad position for writing a review. Luckily, I overhead a conversation between two mildly hydrocephalic young women which pretty much summed up the whole series: One of them remarked "I usually, like, get bored before the end of a movie. That's why I couldn't watch the first two Austin Powers movies. But, like, this one I stayed through to the end." Yes, the first two films were quite challenging. Thank God they finally dumbed one down for the masses. On the plus side, there is no poop drinking in this installment, though there is a good deal of "watersports." I was pleased to learn that urine is considerably less disgusting than poop. Also, as an added bonus, the writers didn't have to write any new jokes, as there were plenty in the first two movies, so they just used those. Still, these movies are critic-proof, and if you liked the previous outings, I'm sure you'll enjoy this one. Especially if you enjoy watching someone peel and eat his own skin, watching a midget get pummeled by a moron, watching anything that's shaped like a breast and watching people pee on the floor, artwork, a laboratory and each other. --DiGiovanna
THE COUNTRY BEARS. Disneyland's venerable Country Bear Jamboree attraction may have been cute, what with its nostalgically low-tech animatronic bears indulging in Hee Haw--style comedy and music and all, but the thin concept obviously needed a boost since the makers of this extravaganza have borrowed plot elements from such movies as Stuart Little and The Blues Brothers. Haley Joel Osment continues his voice-over career (which recently has included sequels to The Hunchback of Notre Dame and Jungle Book) by becoming Beary Barrington, the adopted bear-cub son of a human family. He hits the road to reunite his favorite singing group--the Country Bears, natch--for a gig to save Country Bear Hall from the clutches of a greedy developer, played with scenery-devouring evilness by Christopher Walken. This is fair-to-middlin' G-rated entertainment, spiced up by cameo appearances by musical luminaries as Willie Nelson, Elton John, Don Henley, Bonnie Raitt, Brian Setzer and Queen Latifah. And you can't fault the Country Bears for chops--John Hiatt lends his voice to one of the singing bears. --Armstrong
THE EMPEROR'S NEW CLOTHES. Ian Holm lately has played roles as diverse as the hobbit Bilbo Baggins in The Lord of the Rings and the morally-conflicted personal-injury lawyer in The Sweet Hereafter. He's an asset to any movie, especially one as under-nourished as this fable-like re-imagining of the final years of Napoleon Bonaparte. Director Alan Taylor made the confident independent film Palookaville in 1995 and has since directed episodes of such esteemed TV fare as Six Feet Under, The Sopranos and The West Wing. Now he takes on this light-weight bit of whimsy that seems to have its fairy tales mixed up. An exiled Napoleon hires a look-alike commoner to take his place, but when the time comes the stand-in enjoys himself too much to give up his new identity. Sounds more like "The Prince and the Pauper," no? Worse, the movie can't decide if it wants to be a romance, a comedy or a historical epic. Danish actress Iben Hjele (High Fidelity) is a nice addition, as is the enchanting score by Rachel Portman. --Armstrong
FULL FRONTAL. Writer-director Steven Soderbergh (Traffic, Ocean's 11) takes on the illusions and artificialities of contemporary Hollywood in this complicated ensemble drama that works well on so many levels one viewing may not be enough. Shot both on 35mm and digital video, it ostensibly tells the story of a fictional movie shoot. Julia Roberts plays an actress playing a magazine reporter and Blair Underwood plays an actor playing an actor. But we also get to see how their off-screen characters' lives intertwine with those of other stars, the producer, the screenwriter, the screenwriter's wife, the screenwriter's wife's sister and the screenwriter's dog, among others. The film was made in 18 days with most of the cast--which includes David Hyde Pierce, Catherine Keener, David Duchovny, Mary McCormack, Brad Pitt, Nicky Katt--taking drastic pay cuts just to work with Soderbergh. If you love such movies-about-moviemaking as Day For Night, State and Main, Time Code and Shadow of the Vampire, this film's for you. It's a gem in which the flaws are just as beautiful as the facets. --Armstrong
K-19: THE WIDOWMAKER. You'll be forgiven if you occasionally can't tell K-19: The Widowmaker from other entries in the sub-movie genre. The bottom line is that it is, like, really dangerous sailing below the waves, locked inside a metal tube and propelled by potentially faulty nuclear power. But director Kathryn Bigelow (who has proven herself adept at coherent action with Near Dark, Point Break and Strange Days) and star Harrison Ford acquit themselves well in this flick, which is based on actual but long-suppressed Cold War events in 1961. The titular Soviet sub, captained by a Russian-accented Ford, breaks down only 400 kilometers off the Eastern coast of the United States, and the crew has to work feverishly to avoid two things: being killed in the meltdown and starting World War III. Liam Neeson and Peter Sarsgaard add some acting weight to the affair, which does not altogether sink --Armstrong
LOVELY AND AMAZING. Following her minor indie hit Walking & Talking, writer-director Nicole Holofcener offers a serious family comedy that deals in realistic ways with unique situations. Thirtysomething sisters Michelle and Elizabeth (Catherine Keener, Emily Mortimer) deal with unpredictable careers and even less stable men. Their middle-aged mother (Brenda Blethyn) struggles to raise adopted 8-year-old daughter Annie (Raven Goodwin), who happens to be African-American. Some of the men complicating their lives include Jake Gyllenhaal, James Le Gros, Clark Gregg and Dermot Mulroney. Lovely & Amazing, in its own messy and implausible manner, finds authentic humor and drama in narcissism, low self-image, infidelity, statutory rape, hair-straightening and the dangers of liposuction. You'll not be able to predict what's coming next in this completely charming and offbeat movie. --Armstrong
MARTIN LAWRENCE RUNTELDAT. Besides the vulgar language, the graphic sex talk, the harsh stereotypes, the blatant prejudices and the crude racial innuendos, this self-indulgent therapeutic stand-up comedy riff by actor/comedian Martin Lawrence is a humorous 100-minute romp for those too cheap to see an actual comedy bit at an auditorium, too Cable TV deprived to watch one on HBO, or too lazy to hunt down the 1994 straight-to-video shtick, You So Crazy, by the human clone of Mr. Potato Head. Now with this MTV production, hear the Bad Boy set the record straight on his criminal past, his previous medical problems and his personal sex fetishes and child-beating encouragements. Better yet, appreciate the underlying historical racial significance of an African American performing at the Constitution Hall in our nation's capital where Marian Anderson once was denied such a privilege. --Hernon
MASTER OF DISGUISE. Behold the divine excellence of cinematic genius, the Citizen Kane of the 21st century, the Holy Grail of Hollywood, the Muhammad Ali of movies, the FDR of films and all else that is sacred and capable of such epic grandeur. Oh wait. Wrong movie. I'm supposed to be reviewing the asinine crock-pot co-written by Dana Carvey who also stars as a dimwitted human parrot that assumes the secret family legacy of harnessing the almighty invisible energy filed, consulting the sacred pop-up book and activating the wondrous Ball of Knowledge, which unfortunately is much too small to affect the brainless makers of this 74-minute kindergarten finger painting. However, I digress because how else would the SNL alum be able to transform into a hairy pimp, Mrs. Roeper's evil twin or a cow pie in order to acquire the clues that are too far-fetched and illogical even for the Scooby-Doo gang but that are needed to free his kidnapped parents held captive by a vengeful cigar man with a flatulence problem. --Hernon
MEN IN BLACK II. Variety reports that at 88 minutes and with a budget of $140 million, this is the most expensive (if you're talking dollars per minute) live-action film yet. The near-constant product placement and corporate tie-ins should probably help defray the costs, though. Anyway, agents Jay and Kay--I never could figure out who's who, but that probably proves I'm not a devoted MIB aficionado--return with their really big guns to save the universe from aliens. That doesn't stop them from palling around with a few, such as those suave tuber-looking creatures. The evil alien here is a slinky-looking Lara Flynn Boyle, who has a penchant for dominatrix-style lingerie; her two-headed sidekick is creepily played by MTV's Johnny Knoxville. Even if this effects-laden sequel seems like a bald retread, the natural chemistry between bantering heroes Will Smith and Tommy Lee Jones is enough to carry the film. Oh yeah, Martha Stewart and Michael Jackson make cameo appearances--as if either of them needed more attention. --Armstrong
RAIN. A coming-of-age film that eschews much of the moralizing common to the genre, Rain is set in New Zealand in the seventies. Thirteen-year-old Janey, upset at her mothers boozing and infidelity, makes sexual advances on her mother's lover. Shot in a dreamy style, with a moody soundtrack by former Crowded House songster Neil Finn, Rain is almost too pretty for its own good. Its strongest feature is the performance by newcomer Alicia Fulford-Wierzbicki as Janey, who is so talented she'll probably never work again. While a refreshing break from the Hollywood summer blockbusters, Rain is probably too quiet and intelligent to attract a lot of attention, but then again that's what they said about Niels Bohr. --DiGiovanna
REIGN OF FIRE. The last few humans on Earth battle fire-breathing dragons in England in the year 2020. Along with massive computer-animated dragons--with the attendant nitro-napalm expectoration--this flick also boasts a decrepit castle, tanks, a helicopter, automatic weapons, fist fights, heavy artillery, horse stunts, underground tunnels, motorcycles, computer-imaging tchochtkes, extreme sky-diving, crossbow arrows with explosive points and a bona fide medieval battle ax. Christian Bale, Matthew McConaughey and Izabella Scorupco add a homo sapiens element to all the hardware, which is admirably wrangled by X-Files director Rob Bowman. Comic relief, in the form of not-unpleasant quips in the face of danger, is provided by a charming Gerard Butler. Can you guess whom the dragons toast first? Call it a guilty pleasure if you must. But at its heart, this is a way-cool example of escapist sci-fi and fantasy. --Armstrong
ROAD TO PERDITION. Based on a graphic-novel by crime writer Max Allan Collins, this is the second movie directed by Sam Mendes, whose first was the Academy Award-winning American Beauty. It marks an about-face from that post-modern dysfunctional-family epic. Set in the wintry Depression-era Midwest, Road to Perdition gives us instead a functional and happy family in which the stern-though-loving father, Michael Sullivan (Tom Hanks, effortlessly discarding his stereotypical nice-guy image), just happens to be a hit man for the Irish-American Mafia. Some internecine complications and the dishonorable son of mob boss Paul Newman result in the murder of Sullivan's wife (Jennifer Jason Leigh) and youngest son. So he and his 12-year-old son (Tylor Hoechlin) embark on a picturesque road trip of revenge and, believe it or not, spiritual redemption. Jude Law contributes a decent job as a sleazy photojournalist-cum-assassin. Beautiful period settings, a well-paced plot and understated acting make this a film to savor. For once, the hype about Oscar expectations seems warranted. --Armstrong
SPY KIDS 2: THE ISLAND OF LOST DREAMS. The Cortez family is back in action as writer-director Robert Rodriguez (Desperado) stands to make a bundle from this second installment in his family-oriented espionage-action franchise. This time, Carmen and Juni (Alexa Vega and Daryl Sabra) are off to the titular isle where they find mutated animals and a Dr. Moreau-type mad scientist (Steve Buscemi). Their goal? Save the world from an energy crisis, I think. The plot tends to take a back seat to the gadget-heavy action. In fact, Rodriguez seems to have made up for the slim story with lots of cool bells and whistles in the form of computer-generated effects. Carmen and Juni bicker and cooperate with the charm of real siblings, though. And you can't help but appreciate the Latino heroes whether pint-size or grown-up--it should be noted that the gorgeous Cortez parents (Antonio Banderas, Carla Gugino) return with their star appeal, as well. --Armstrong
STUART LITTLE 2. He plays soccer. He drives classy convertibles. He flies model airplanes. And, he's just a 3-inch tall mouse dressed in designer clothing. That's right, Stuart Little (voiced by Michael J. Fox) is back as the cute and cuddly computer-animated critter, and he's brought along a few new friends to share his latest adventure in director Rob Minkoff's follow-up to his 1999 original. When evil Falcon (voiced by James Woods) uses an innocent pawn to steal Mrs. Little's (Geena Davis) wedding ring, our hero scales skyscrapers and journeys on garbage barges to retrieve the diamond ring and to rescue the damsel in distress (voiced by Melanie Griffith). Besides the obvious mystery as to what a bird will do with expensive jewelry and the overtly corny Father Knows Best family, the fun new editions to the cast, the charming entertainment of the original characters and the convincing special effects allows Minkoff to pull off a sequel that actually works. --Hernon
SUNSHINE STATE. Writer/Director John Sayles juggles an ensemble cast and several subplots using timely editing and fluid handheld camera work in this charming yet temporarily memorable film. When a large developing corporation threatens to transform a quaint little Florida beach town into a money-making mess of strip malls, resorts and tourist attractions, the local townsfolk let us glimpse their complex lives and personal beliefs concerning the politics of progress that have both racial and social origins. An independent business owner (Edie Falco) exhausted at the helm of her family-owned motel/restaurant, an ostracized daughter turned infomercial diva (Angela Bassett) now aware of the sentimental importance of her hometown, and genealogy and a determined local man proud of his African-American heritage yet disgruntled by the Civil Rights repercussions are just a few of the colorful characters that skillfully feed the corporate versus kindred theme. Despite the poignant plot and subplots, this lengthy drama ultimately leaves you indifferent and in a cloudy State. --Hernon
XXX. Admit it: Whenever you see or hear the title of this new flick--showcasing ultra-buff Vin Diesel as extreme-athlete-turned-secret-agent Xander Cage--you half hope it refers to the rating. No such luck. In this film by Rob Cohen (who directed Diesel in last year's hot-rod spectacular The Fast and the Furious), X Games collide with a James Bond for the '00s. Stunt fans will love this picture, in which Diesel does such things as ride a metal tray down a handrail, flee from snowmobiles on a snowboard and has a fire fight in a bona fide castle. The story has something to do with some rogue Russian soldiers starting a terrorist team in the Czech Republic. The exotic locations, including some nice views of Prague, are a plus. Super-bad Samuel L. Jackson and eye candy Asia Argento add to the movie's appeal. As for Diesel, he couldn't be more Diesel: all fueled up and with everywhere to go. Action-film fans could do worse than this. --Armstrong
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