Tucson Weekly: The Skinny (February 26

Skinny MILLER'S BIG SPLASH: Republican state Sen. Ann Day represents a whole lot of people who are served by Tucson Water, the City of Tucson-owned utility. Unfortunately, many of Day's constituents live in the county, and therefore have no voice in setting water rates and policies because they aren't city residents. And short of annexation--the current city leadership's ultimate goal--there isn't a lot that can be done to change this, although Day tried by introducing legislation to give those folks some voice in water decisions.
As her bill dodged and weaved through this legislative session, however, it morphed into something else--a "use-it-or-lose-it" order to Arizona's cities.
That's the same message Tucson Mayor George Miller stressed during the 1997 campaign to repeal the Water Consumer Protection Act, passed by more than 57 percent of the voters in 1995. Miller--and others--argued that if voters didn't drink that CAP crap, the state would step in.
Now, as Miller predicted, the state is indeed stepping in, albeit mildly. And what's Miller's reaction? He's telling them to bug out--it's none of their business. It's a shame George didn't take such a strong stand during last year's initiative campaign.
But Miller doesn't want to use CAP water the way the voters prescribed, so he and the Tucson Water bureaucracy are dragging their feet. He only wants to use it his way, which involves massive chemical treatment and--gulp!--straight down our throats.
Bottom line: The Legislature wouldn't be interfering with Tucson Water policies if the City Council would get started on serious recharge programs. It's been more than two years since voters said they wanted to recharge the water. It's time to quit stalling.
MAYBE HE'LL RUN MIKE CRAWFORD: We're told Tucson Mayor George Miller has quietly informed Democratic legislators from Pima County to oppose any new incorporation bill, or he'll find candidates to face them in the primary election this September. Oooh, we're positively quaking.
Since Miller has great difficulty in finding four votes on the Tucson City Council most of the time, we suspect he'd have even more trouble finding viable candidates to run against incumbent legislators. But this does illustrate both his obsession and his petty vindictiveness.
The bill breathing new life into Tortolita, Casas Adobes and some potential new communities sailed through the House Ways and Means Committee 8 to 2, with local Democrat Ramon Valadez voting "aye." Valadez, considered one of the bright young Demo stars of the Pima legislative delegation, has worked as an aide to Pima County Supervisor Dan Eckstrom, a job which familiarized him with Tucson's bullying tactics.
Phoenix sources tell us the bill will probably pass the House, thanks to the efforts of Rep. Bill McGibbon. Unfortunately, with no real spear-carrier in the Senate, the bill will likely run into trouble there. Maricopa interests, not Tucson's lobbyists or Miller, hold the key in the Senate, and several GOP senators oppose the bill for their own reasons. But it ain't over til it's over.
DISTRICT 12 DONNEYBROOK: It's official--that running dog for the Growth Lobby, long-time Tucson radio talk-show host John C. Scott, is seeking the GOP nomination for the state House of Representatives in District 12. Scott, who served in the state Senate as a Democrat before his current re-incarnation as Republican, will be in the brawl for one of the two seats in that heavily GOP district.
Incumbent Dan Schottel is seeking re-election, while the other incumbent, Freddie Hershberger, has said she plans to retire.
Circling that open seat along with Scott are two other GOP candidates:
• Vicki Cox-Golder, a real estate broker who was creamed when she ran for the Board of Supes in 1996. A former member of the Amphi School Board, Cox-Golder is handicapped by the shady circumstances regarding the $2.5 million the school district spent acquiring property it never bothered to have appraised.
• Steve Huffman, a real estate broker who has worked on campaigns for Cox-Golder and U.S. Rep. Jim Kolbe. Huffman unsuccessfully ran against the two District 12 incumbents in the GOP primary in 1996, targeting Schottel with negative mailers.
The two winners of the primary will face Democrat Andy Morales, head of the Amphi teachers union. If Cox-Golder wins, expect Morales to focus on her record on the Amphi Board, particularly regarding those sleazy land deals.
WEATHER OR NOT: Once upon a time, human beings were terrified by natural phenomena like solar eclipses. When the skies darkened, the primitives figured they had angered the gods and rounded up the virgins for sacrifice.
Our genetic memory has had funny little flashbacks to those days ever since this El Niño thing blew into town. The local TV Chicken Littles have hysterically panicked nearly every time dark clouds have appeared on the horizon. Remember last fall, when Hurricane Nora was approaching? Our TV stations--with "team coverage," no less--spent a week warning us to fill sandbags, stock up on canned goods, build arks and gather all the creatures of the land two-by-two. Nora then delivered a mere trace of rain to our valley.
KGUN-TV, Channel 9's lead story on Monday, February 16, went into great detail about an approaching storm. We saw video footage of flowing washes as KGUN's intrepid newsreaders posed the burning question: Will the rains wipe out every trace of our civilization?
"If we get enough tomorrow in a short amount of time, the washes that are full tonight might be pushed to their limit," Colleen Bagnell solemnly reported. "But, experts say, chances are that won't happen."
OK--so now it's news that we probably won't get flooding from our winter rain. Now that's a lead story!
We have a few more suggestions for stories that experts say probably won't happen: If Gov. Jane Dee Hull is found to be the real killer of Nicole Brown Simpson and Ron Goldman, she probably won't be re-elected! If Kenneth Starr is caught in a menage a trois with Monica Lewinsky and Hillary Clinton, he probably would be fired from his post as special prosecutor! And if space aliens triggered the dormant volcano beneath A Mountain, downtown Tucson would be overrun with lava!
The following night, KGUN broke another amazing story with its lead piece: The water in our washes eventually percolates down to the aquifer, becoming the very water we drink!
And here we thought Tucson Water kept all that water in filing cabinets down at City Hall.
FLUSH THE SWOOSH: As the UA Athletic Department races headlong into a deal with the Nike megacorp, a few students have risen to protest the deal, which would plaster Nike swooshes on the UA athletes' butts in exchange for free uniforms.
Nike, of course, pays foreign sweatshop workers chickenfeed to stitch together the shoes and clothes the company sells for outrageous profits.
These days, the honchos at Nike are eager to find new marketing opportunities, and have been wooing universities around the country with similar deals.
New UA President Peter Likins recently met with Nike chief Phil Knight, and concluded that Nike really does care about those foreign workers--so much so, that they've even sworn to pay 'em "the minimum compensation and benefits required by local law," according to the Nike Code of Conduct. Glad to know they're willing to meet those standards!
We think the whole deal stinks--and worse, that it's just the tip of the iceberg, as we begin to prostitute our centers of higher learning to all manner of Corporate America sponsorship.
If you agree, get on down to the north side of McKale Center at 10 a.m. this Saturday, February 28, where Students Against Sweatshops will be protesting the deal--while, of course, supporting the Cats before the Stanford game.

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