COINCIDENTAL CO-ED CAPER
MARCH 4, 9:34 A.M.
A naked man—apparently intent on having sex with a UA student—was thwarted after he climbed into the wrong bed at a residence hall, according to a UA Police Department report.
UA officers were called to the Manzanita-Mohave Residence Hall, 1010 N. Park Ave., where they met a female resident who claimed that a strange man had entered her room earlier that morning and tried to get into bed with her.
When she began screaming, the man asked her, "Are you sure this is the wrong room?" according to the report. At that point, a woman who lives across the hall entered the room, addressed the man and handed him a green article of clothing to "conceal his nude body," the report said. The woman and the man then left the scene.
The victim said her room had been mostly dark at the time of the incident, but that she saw "the male's buttocks and his flaccid penis surrounded by pubic hair." She told police she wanted to press charges.
The man was later found across the hall wearing green boxer shorts. He insisted that he had been wearing them when he entered the wrong room. After he was dressed, police searched the man and found a generic Adderall pill, which the man could not prove was prescribed for him.
He was taken to jail.
BEER IN THE TRASH
WEST RUTHRAUFF ROAD
FEB. 7, 10:01 P.M.
A liquor-store employee allegedly tried to swipe beer from the store by hiding it in a trash bin, a Pima County Sheriff's Department report stated.
Deputies went to the Super H liquor store, 2710 W. Ruthrauff Road, and met with the owner, who said she had seen one of her employees taking a cart to the trash bin that day, and that she believed "something strange was going on."
She said another employee later found two 12-packs of Tecate in the trash bin beneath some discarded cardboard.
Deputies checked the trash bin and recovered the beer, which was still cold.
The owner said she had told the subject earlier to leave for the rest of the evening. When deputies went to his home, the subject eventually admitted stashing the beer in the trash bin, but said he hadn't planned to retrieve it, and that if the garbage truck picked it up, that was fine with him.
The subject was arrested on suspicion of shoplifting.