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F--- THY NEIGHBOR

WEST INA ROAD

MARCH 16, 4:14 A.M.

An inebriated man disturbed his neighbors with odd behavior and his loud, liberal use of the F-word, according to a Pima County Sheriff's Department report.

After three complaints of unreasonable noise at an apartment complex, the reporting deputy went to the apartment being complained about and stood outside the door for five minutes.

Although he had earlier spoken with the resident—who claimed he was merely watching TV by himself—the deputy could hear no TV or music. Instead, he heard a loud male voice shouting, "Fuck me," "Fuck them, "Fuck the neighbors," "Fuck the children," and, "Fuck everyone." The deputy also heard loud banging noises—as if someone were stomping on the floor—and maniacal laughter.

The reportees said that the man living there had been yelling all night and was waking them up repeatedly. They said he'd undergone brain surgery in the past and was on a lot of medication; however, they also knew he was drinking heavily.

When contacted, the subject denied yelling, stomping and laughing, but admitted drinking; he was swaying back and forth as he spoke.

The subject was arrested for disturbing the peace.


HE MISSED THE SMELLY PROOF

UA AREA

APRIL 4, 11:20 A.M.

A previous drug bust apparently failed to teach vigilance to a self-proclaimed marijuana-smoker, a UA police report stated.

A UA officer pulled over a vehicle at Fourth Street and Highland Avenue for running a stop sign.

"Oh, yeah, I didn't see it there," said the driver.

The officer noticed a potent smell of marijuana coming from the car. However, the driver—a young Caucasian male—denied having anything illegal on him, explaining, "I don't carry (substances) in the car with me since I got a ticket for that." He said he had last smoked marijuana a few days ago.

During a search of the vehicle, the reporting officer found a plastic bag labeled "Smelly Proof" in the pouch on the back side of the passenger seat. It smelled strongly of marijuana.

The subject said he thought he had cleared his car of all marijuana and paraphernalia after he was last cited for possessing it; however, he must have missed that bag, he said, which he admitted once held a marijuana pipe. He openly admitted that he still smoked marijuana, even though he knew it was illegal.

The subject then proceeded to beg the reporting officer not to arrest him, saying it was a bad time for him, at which point the officer reminded him that possessing marijuana paraphernalia was illegal.

The subject was arrested.

More by Anna Mirocha

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