West Park Ridge Road, March 13, 8:35 a.m.
A woman who had enjoyed some early-morning drinking refused to don clothing during a confrontation with law enforcement, according to a Pima County Sheriff's Department report.
Sheriff's deputies were dispatched to the woman's residence after a domestic-violence call by her husband, who alleged that she had been drinking tequila since very early that day and had thrown a remote control at him during a dispute over a television program. Sheriff's deputies found the wife in bed and told her to get up; she refused and began yelling profanities at them. One deputy then pulled the blanket off the woman, replacing it quickly upon discovering that she had nothing but panties on. When she still refused to get up or dress, the blanket was again removed, and she was forced into a robe.
The obviously intoxicated woman declared that her husband was lying about everything, but she was arrested anyway. She continued to yell profanities all the way to jail and would not answer simple intake questions. Deputies had great difficulty ensuring that her robe covered her body at all times.
Mount Lemmon, March 15, 6:53 p.m.
A disgruntled camper threatened to burn down an entire campsite and its visitors, said a PCSD report.
When first encountered by sheriff's deputies, the subject was in a violent state, being held to the ground by other campers at Mount Lemmon's General Hitchcock Campground. Taken into custody, the man alleged that his neighbors had stolen his firewood while he was sleeping. Other campers denied this fact, stating that he had passed out in his tent from drinking, and when he awoke, he began wielding a large stick and accusing surrounding campers, including children, of stealing his firewood. He said he would burn down their camps.
The man was arrested for threats and intimidation, and disorderly conduct. One-eighth of a bottle of Jim Beam was found in his tent.
Out for a Moonlight Drool
West Desert Dawn Trail, March 11, 11:28 p.m.
A man roaming his neighborhood at night shouted interesting expletives at residents and sheriff's deputies, according to a PCSD report.
Officials received a call that a confrontational male was wandering the streets yelling profanities and phrases such as, "Don't snitch on me!" very loudly. Deputies later found him in his own driveway, extremely intoxicated with spit and drool coming out of his mouth. Since nobody he lived with could be located, he was arrested and transported to the hospital. En route, he screamed and called his escorts "white niggers" and "deputy douche bags."
Admitted to the emergency room, the subject continued to yell at doctors. Due to his extremely intoxicated state, he would not be released for eight to 10 hours.