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Tom muses on Conventions and that guy from ‘KNS’ radio

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Three things for which Republicans should be thankful:

1. Barack Obama is constitutionally barred from running for a third term. President Obama would squish Donald Trump like a bug.

2. Joe Biden had to deal with the death of his son and couldn't mount a primary campaign.

3. Michelle Obama isn't interested in running for anything...yet.

Any one of those three people would have whupped Donald Trump like they were his daddy.

•The other day, I was driving along and I came to a stop on southbound Thornydale and Orange Grove. Pulling up next to me in the lane where you can only make a left turn on the arrow was a guy in a pickup truck; in the back of the truck was this big mother Confederate flag. It was gigantic. I looked over and, never having been blessed/cursed with that thing in my head that tells me how to act right, I just busted out laughing. The guy, who looked like he had just come from an all-night concert featuring a Lynyrd Skynyrd tribute band, snapped at me, "What's so *#!%! funny?"

I said, "Oh, I'm sorry, Dude. No offense. It's just that I've never seen a black guy driving around with a Confederate flag before."

He said, "What?! I'm not black!"

I leaned out my window and peered at him. "You're not?," I asked. Then, after a pause, I asked, "Are you sure?"

Before he could respond, the light turned green and I drove off, leaving him to wait for the arrow. God, I hope I ruined his day.

•Best line of either convention: "We (Americans) don't look to be ruled."

•I've said before that if they had had ADHD when I was a kid, I would have been the poster child for it. (Back then, the clinical diagnosis was "Oh, he's just a boy.") I mostly outgrew it, but I still have some echoes of it. When I was watching the conventions, I would jump back and forth between CNN, Fox, and MSNBC. After President Obama's knockout speech, I watched Fox to see if they would at least acknowledge that the Republicans don't have ANYONE who can talk like that. But, nothing.

Then, after midnight (3:00 a.m. back east) Fox showed the President's speech. I figured that, by that time, most of their Southern viewers would be under their sheets instead of wearing them.

•What is so freakin' hard about saying "Oops, sorry, I messed up?" I always thought that was part of being a grownup. Donald Trump never acknowledges making a mistake, and now one of his surrogates, Bill O'Reilly, is taking the same tack.

After Michelle Obama uttered the poignant line about waking up every morning in a house built by slaves, the fake-ass, self-styled "historian" O'Reilly claimed that the slaves were "well-fed" and had "decent lodging." After the swift and predictable backlash, O'Reilly took the Trump route and doubled down. An exhaustive search of historical records showed no evidence that the slaves were treated as anything but slaves (Abigal Adams wrote that the slaves were "half-fed and destitute of clothing"), O'Reilly bitched out completely and began screaming about "smear merchants" who were out to get him. A simple "I got that wrong" would have sufficed.

•I hate the fact that I look like every single person who was at the Republican convention, including the women. I've got to lose weight again and, this time, keep it off.

•I am addicted to exactly two things in this world—diet soda and right-wing talk radio. I can't help myself. Whenever I'm in the car on a weekday, I listen to the purveyors of hate and distortion and outright falsehoods. They're just so entertaining.

I listen to Sean Hannity, who is the rudest of them all. I think he'll achieve personal Nirvana when he figures out a way to interrupt himself, because he damn sure interrupts everybody else. I sometimes listen to Rush Limbaugh, but he's kinda pathetic. It's embarrassing listening to him try to reconcile his conservative ideals with his support for Trump, who has no ideals.

I also listen to the local guys. They do an okay job. They certainly know their audience and they cater/pander thereto. That's good business. But one of the morning guys is doing this petty little thing that's driving me crazy. Just like his patron saint, the aforementioned washed-up Limbaugh, this guy refers to the "Democrat Party."

There is no Democrat Party. It's the Democratic Party. It always has been and it always will be. I guess that intentionally calling it the wrong thing would be funny until about the seventh grade but then puberty would kick in. Look at it this way. We'll say that the radio host and I are at a social gathering and I introduce him to someone by saying, "This is Joe Smith from KNS." He naturally would correct me and say, "It's KNST." So we go to the next person and I introduce him as Joe Smith from KNS.

After a few dozen times, he'll realize that I'm just being a jerk to try to get under his skin. It's the same with people who insist on incorrectly referring to the "Democrat Party. It seems like they're just being pissy because they've got no game.

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