Confidentially Speaking... 

Confidential to the reader who called me last week and, after I answered the phone, said: "Oh, um, I was hoping to get your voicemail": I'm sorry for actually answering my phone. I have no idea what I was thinking.

Confidential to the racist loons who try to leave comments at TucsonWeekly.com: Can you please take some spelling lessons? Seriously. There's really an odd (and strangely reassuring) correlation between terrible spelling and bigotry.

Confidential to the Ted Vogt campaign: We do so love the attention that you paid to us in a press release following last week's Skinny item that involved you ("Neocon Cash"). First, we don't consider it a bad thing when we're called the "liberal media." Second, your press release didn't address the fact that you had received more in campaign contributions from Dick Cheney, Donald Rumsfeld and their inner circles than actual Arizonans, as of your last campaign-finance report. Considering you're running for the state Legislature, that's disconcerting—and it would be equally disconcerting if a Democratic candidate were getting more money from, say, Bill Clinton and Al Gore than actual Arizonans.

Confidential to the Arizona Daily Star: I am sorry for laughing out loud after I received an e-mail from you with the subject line: "the Arizona Daily Star: Help us keep improving." While I have not seen very many (any?) improvements from you lately, it was still rude of me to shoot coffee out my nose as I read that. Please accept my apologies.

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