Enjoyed reading, but agree with some comments that there most definitely is a way to use drugs responsibly and I know many people who do. It is interesting to hear the accounts of you, who clearly can not, or have not been able to control it. I think your problem is that you were chasing highs for awhile, and so that is how you approached becoming inebriated on a drug, you chased the next best level it had to offer.
Although a better approach is before starting a relationship with any plant or drug is to research it. Come to understand how to best use it and start off small. If you know something can be addicting, don't do it enough to let it addict you, if you feel you are becoming addicted stop. If you cannot do research, and use responsibly you have no right to use, and have only your own naivety to blame for your circumstances.
I am sorry you reached this low a point, but you should stay off pods until you can look at them a different way, reset your tolerance and go on a healthier diet. Embrace healthy, rejuvenating ways of life. Being addicted to pods your entire life is NOT a choice, that's just suicide and you know it dude.
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