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Comment Archives: stories: Cinema: Cinema Feature

Re: “'Sex' Sucks

I agree! Samantha was totally cringe-worthy in this film... I had to cover my eyes & mouth many times she came on the screen acting like a 12 year old, or talking like a dirty whore. The part where she goes nuts after she drops her bag (and subsequently condoms) in the market, is embarrassing! Liza's act was the best part of the movie, and my main thought was that the gay wedding should have been at the end instead of the start, so to leave some sort of good impression before the credits roll.

Posted by brima on 06/07/2010 at 3:34 AM

Re: “Conservatives and Cash

Mr. DiGiovanna:

Usually when you pan directors you come up with your own insults and whether I disagree, you are original and entertaining. But calling Michael Moore's editing manipulative? That has been used so many times that there are five patents out on it. I think you owe someone money for that one. And when you call Error Morris "self-serving" because he has a style only makes you sound like a jealous film school drop out.

Otherwise, I agree that Gibney is the best of the three, but they all have their place. I hope everyone goes to see this one. It is appalling and diminishes any hope in our democracy that I had left, almost.

Peace,
Tex Shelters

Posted by Tex Shelters on 05/23/2010 at 3:32 PM

Re: “Abs vs. Eyebrows

This has to be the funniest, most brilliant review I've ever read...

"and the pale-face makeup and hairdo make him look like some sort of anemic hipster clown."

I'm still laughing...

Posted by gsmith on 04/17/2010 at 4:51 AM

Re: “Everyman Heroes

Gee, it sounds pretty good... But at the same time, the premise doesn't really sound that revolutionary. Glad you liked it though.

Posted by Bongo on 04/17/2010 at 2:43 AM

Re: “Wait for the Surprise

i love this movie it is the best horror movie ever! Everyone i know said that at the first 5 or 10 minuites they had to walk out the theater because it was so scary!!! but i watched it and isabelle was awesome!!! i wish that i could be in a movie like that. i wish i can be an actress like her and everyone else!!! i want to know how you made isabell look old!!! that was awesome!!! i hope there will be another orphan!!! thats how good it is!!!i wanna be an actress just like her!!! i wish i could meet her. but ill probably be a little freaked out around her because of that movie she made!!! well i think the movie is awesome and keep on making those movies isabelle!!!

Posted by macimay on 04/05/2010 at 9:26 AM

Re: “The Moping Undead

I have to agree that BOTH the books and the movie sucks.

My sister is a huge Twi-fan and fell in love with the series after she watched "Twilight." To see what the hype was all about, i watched the movie. I think i aged ten years by watching it, cause it dragged on for so long! The only action in the movie lasted about five secounds and i felt ripped off! I tried to read the first, hem hem, 'novel' but i was bored out of my skull by the secound chapter. If i try to read the rest of it, I'm pretty sure I would end up blowing my brains out.

The really sad part of all this is... these are the ONLY BOOKS MY SISTER HAS EVER READ and she says that they are the best books ever.

I have no problem saying that I am a bookworm, because I can seriously lay down some books, but i wish i could convince my sister to try other authors.

Oh and for you Twi-teens out there. I have an author for you! SHERRILYN KENYON
Paronormal Romance- "Dark Hunter" novels- Vampires with a twist! All her books are AWSOME! And you don't have to read them in any order to get the story either.

Posted by DarkHunterJenn on 03/01/2010 at 10:25 PM

Re: “Abs vs. Eyebrows

I like the books and so i watch the movies when they come out. I enjoy the fact that they are one of my favourite books brought to life ( although in a critic sense i don't think the books are massive grammy winners i just like the easy reading and romantic story), but im not going to delude myself into thinking that the acting is brilliant. You have got to admit they need to cheer up i mean do they ever actually have a laugh. At least in the books they are playful and well normal. I just wish stewart was happier, i don't even know where this too pale stuttering awkward girl has come from because she aint this bad in the books, o and edward is much more cocky and natural around bella, he's too intense in the films.

Posted by rachmb25 on 02/18/2010 at 5:31 AM

Re: “Watch That Rice

Sorry Bongo, I have no idea who you are!

Posted by James DiGiovanna on 02/15/2010 at 4:42 PM

Re: “Watch That Rice

P.S. James Digiovanna, if you are out there, reading this, and if you think you know who I am, EMAIL ME!!! Tell me about your farts!!!

Posted by Bongo on 02/12/2010 at 10:31 PM

Re: “Watch That Rice

WTF.... which stands for, "Why the fart?"

Does the fart somehow lead to the beheading?

I want to see a mainstream Hollywood movie about the repercussions of farts.

Posted by Bongo on 02/12/2010 at 10:31 PM

Re: “Life Rejected

I've waded through many a self-absorbed and contorted reading into Eraserhead, but this is the best summation of the film I have read. Thanks.

Posted by CosmicKeys on 02/12/2010 at 8:36 PM

Re: “Watch That Rice

Well the trailer looks pretty good. Good sound, good cinematography. I'd watch it, I think, based on the trailer, but I'd skip it, of course, based on your review.

Posted by Ralph on 02/11/2010 at 1:18 PM

Re: “The Moping Undead

Um, whatever, Twi-bitches, the movie AND the book sucked. Bad. And I'm a teenage girl. Who likes other vampire novels. And by "other" I mean "real". STFU and go get a life besides lusting after a fictional angsty teenage flashlight.

Posted by CiaoBella on 02/09/2010 at 3:17 PM

Re: “A Man's Man

Give me back my son!

Posted by Bongo on 02/06/2010 at 8:41 PM

Re: “W.

"W" is a weird movie in that it's amazing it got made, considering it came out when Bush was still in office. I am glad it did, even if it's somewhat slight as cinema. The movie is indeed a giant F.U. to the president, but it's even worse than that, because it looks at him not with scorn so much as a devastating pity. The movie dissects GWB's character and concludes that Bush is at all times lost and confused, motivated by a bizarre need to prove himself without actually doing anything that requires forethought or competence. Part of what makes "W" a strange experience is that it removes the outside world from the depiction -- almost the entire story is set in GWB's inner circle, and the effect is claustrophobic. The point is that GWB is in an insulated bubble removed from the damage he's causing the country and the world, but the movie's lack of a fuller context has the odd effect of making his tragic foolishness seem personally pathetic instead of what it really was -- publically horrendous.

Posted by Bongo on 01/30/2010 at 3:09 AM

Re: “Pretentiously Played

Things that are wrong with "The Lovely Bones":

-- Too much narration by the dead girl
-- Rachel Weisz is hardly in the movie
-- Susan Sarandon has one decent sequence and then is hardly in the movie
-- Mark Wahlberg acts his role "cute"-style as if he's in a cuddly commedy
-- The girl who plays the dead girl has an acting range almost as wide as a tiny rainbow!
-- Heaven resembles a music video for "Lucy in the Sky With Teletubbies"
-- Story creates a bogus dilemma between Getting the Killer, and Healing the Family
-- Dead girl can inahbit a living person, but only to kiss some dude, not catch a murderer
-- When the dead girl finally goes to heaven-heaven and there are a bunch of hobbits there to hug her and jump on the bed, I found this to be inappropriate and over the top

Posted by Bongo on 01/30/2010 at 3:00 AM

Re: “Better and Better

Congratulations on writing a review of this movie without ever mentioning Jeff Bridges' character from "The Big Lebowski." Because obviously his character here is from an alternative reality where The Dude was born in a crappy southern town instead of Los Angeles, drinks whiskey instead of White Russians, and gets to have sex with Maggie Gyllenhaal instead of Julianne Moore.

Jeff Bridges characters are cool, lucky bastards.

This sounds like it would be a good movie for anybody who gives a crap about honky-tonk crap, or who goes to smoky dive bars where people play darts while some wrinkled ruffian croons about his dog's divorce and the holes in his favorite flannel shirt. I'll bet this movie would make good dinner-and-a-movie date material if your date were that toothless, pig-tailed "Hee Haw" chick and your dinner was a truck-stop bowl of gravy with a chicken-fried steak hiding at the bottom.

So let's see what our options are at the movies: "The Jack Chick Tract of Eli," "The Little Dead Girl Who Watches Her Family Suffer Because There's No Tee-Vee in Heaven," "George Clooney Lays People Off, Gets Laid, and Gets Off," and "Jeff Bridges Feels Around Inside His Scraggly C&W Beard and Finds His Soul." Think I'll stay home and hit myself in the head with a ball-peen hammer.





Posted by Bongo on 01/30/2010 at 2:46 AM

Re: “Bible Bump

This would be a better movie if instead of carrying around a bible, Denzel Washington were carrying around Jack Chick tracts.

Posted by Bongo on 01/30/2010 at 2:35 AM

Re: “Bible Bump

I am not at all surprised that I'm apparently the first to comment on this review, at least on-line. First, a disclaimer: I'm an atheist, myself - small 'A'. That means that while I don't believe, I don't begrudge or demean others who do. At the point, Mr. Grimm, where your inner voice said "Yeah, right!" mine said "How did THIS film get a green light in Hollyweird?"

This was a decidedly pro-Christian (not pro-all-religion) film. It said in no uncertain terms that the God of the King James Bible was real, at least to the characters in that film. Unsurprisingly you dismissed that entirely. Carnegie was looking for A book. Not just any religious text would do.

I too saw the similarities between "The Road" and "The Book of Eli." In "The Road" the (unnamed) disaster took place just before the birth of The Boy, about ten years in the past. In "Eli" they mention that it occurred thirty years in the past. They could very well be the same world, separated by a generation. I did not see "The Road." I read the book a few weeks before the film opened and decided I didn't need to spend $9 plus concessions to be deeply depressed at the end.

"Eli" - even for an atheist like me - wasn't depressing. It was a good story, well told, with a "Sixth Sense" twist ending that worked.

But given the subject, I'm not surprised you didn't think better of it.

Posted by Kevin on 01/28/2010 at 12:00 PM

Re: “The Imaginarium of Doctor Parnassus

I'm not a writer; but I do know a worthwhile film when I view it.
Instead of boring you folks (Grimm and Jimmy D.) with my thoughts (they don't keep the viewer in mind anyway), I'd rather you'd read the review at this URL:

http://imaginariumofdrparnassus.com/blog/2…

Even "Christianity Today" gave "Parnassus" a thumb's up. In fact, the NY "Times" supported Gilliam's latest effort...though the readers were more enthusiastic.

My advise to you all: see this flim again...and do a little bit of reading: the "eternal story" being told by the good doctor is an ancient myth...that had been told in many ancient cultures...

People not understanding this film...also failed to understand "El Topo" when it first debuted.

Nuff sed.

Posted by nadienunca on 01/24/2010 at 8:19 PM

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