For the first incident -- you can't fix stupid, and for the second... well, pretty much the same thing, although it would be nice if they could suspend people's driver's licenses for road rage incidents.
Nor could she explain why her cat was in the freezer, her gold fish and bowl were in the dishwasher or why her husband was affixed naked to the bedroom ceiling with duct tape and wearing a crocheted bikini top as a blindfold with mistletoe dangling from his nether regions.
The former "Evil Grimace" has faded from purple to blue and fallen on hard times and hard drugs. I always suspected fast food as a gateway to heroin use and now we have the proof.
Oh cr@p! Do you think getting her title wrong will get me into Gitmo? My type don't do well in prison, after all I'm an angry old white man... oh, wait... never mind.
He is such a great President he's even making storage facilities great again. 96 hours in office and we can already see the great things to come.
Counselor to the President of the United States, is her actual title.
I am woman hear me roar!
In an related story, two five gallon drums of an off-brand oil- and sucrose-based honey-like substance made in China were found abandoned and concealed in the bushes near the site of the earlier altercation. Neither honey vendor had any comment.
According to White House spokesperson Kellyanne Conway, the new administration is considering the introduction of "boutique gated residential estates" (formerly known as public storage sites) as a cost-effective "Real American" solution to the shortage of public housing as a result of eight years of neglect by the out-going administration.
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