This was the worst performance and dinner I have ever experienced. I planned this dinner for an anniversary gift for my wife. The hype on the website explains a nice “candle-lit dinner” and gift of $15 value.
First our arrival. This “dinner theater” is in the rear corner of the Great Wall of China restaurant, near the bathroom and kitchen door. The theater room consists of four small tables, where they seat three couples per table. The stage is nothing more than a tarp with a picture of a moon and castle on it. The show started 45 minutes late.
During the entire performance, workers from the restaurant were exiting the kitchen, and patrons from the restaurant were walking through to use the bathrooms. You see and smell the chinese food and think, “Oh, maybe the food will be good.” Don’t be fooled, you are going to get a budget salad, mediocre at best. The food is a cheap spaghetti noodle dish with white alfredo sauce on it, three steamed baby carrots, three steamed broccoli, and some type of chicken alfredo roll? My thoughts were, “I will probable spend the rest of the night with diarrhea.” To top it off, desert was a small serving of plain cheesecake, nothing more, which had probably been in the back kitchen for over a week.
The talent of a high school play is probably slightly greater than the performance at this theater. The actor who was killed in the play also played the role of the police officer who investigated his murder. The actors chuckled and commented, “What do you expect, this is a low-budget play.” Don’t get me wrong, I did chuckle a few times, but it was largely because I count not believe these people, this experience, was for real, it was really that getto. It was like watching the viral video on YouTube of the “I like turtles” kid, you just can’t believe what just happened.
Our anniversary gift was a dollar-store toy, a plastic ball and chain, gifted for me. How much more romantic can you get, right?
At the end, one actor pulled out a vote ballot from his coat. The ballots appeared to have been in the street for a week, run over and spit on. I was honestly afraid to touch them without having Lysol wipes for my hands afterward. They also give you a tip envelope stapled to a paper advertising 18 and 20 % gratuities. For our two tickets, they wanted $20 on top of the $90 dollars we paid for the show in the first place. On top of it, I had to pay the Great Wall of China restaurant for our two drinks, which also requested a gratuity.
People, if you go to this show, the only thing of actual value you will get is the story you will tell to your great grandchildren about how you and your significant other paid hundreds of dollars to see the worst show of your life in Tucson, Arizona. If that is what you’re looking for, you’ve found it!
I had high hopes, based on advertising, but you should become Leary about the quality of the food and venue when they will not mention it anywhere on their advertisement. As soon as a purchased the tickets and they provided information on how to get there, only then did they say it was at the el parador. The food there is absolutely atrocious and the food at the theater was worse, which I didn't think was possible. If you advertise candle lit 3 course meal, I should not be looking forward to a budget banquet frozen TV dinner or taco bell for some type of improvement after the show. The acting was funny, but by no means is the show worth the horrible food (which the actors elude to also). Could not have been more disappointed.
i dont know how the actual experience is because we never actually went there, but we had tried to plan an event with a group of friends and had called to set it up for this weekend. once we found out that several of our friends would not be available we called back to cancel our reservations, within 2 hours of setting them mind you, and were told that we would be charged anyway. the person who we talked to was rude and insisted that all reservations are a final sale. that there are no refunds or cancelling allowed. i dont know what i would be refunded for, i havent received anything yet, but they think they are allowed to charge me over $400 because we need to cancel a reservation.
This was horrible! I cannot believe I paid $39.00 for this! I wanted my money back. Very, very bad. If you want to see a show go to the gaslight theater! This is a low budget performance!
What a joke! Everyone at our table was staring at each other in disbelief, thinking it had to get better, but it didn't. The writing was horrible, the actors lacked talent, the costumes looked ancient and frayed. The only joy was in laughing at how bad it stunk. Don't waste your money, seriously.
First of all it shouldn't be called a theater, you were placed in a large room with a small stage. The tables were round so you almost broke your neck turning to watch the uber cheesey show. There was extremely blinding light that was in your face while you ate. The dinner was unsatisfactory, portions were small and had no flavor. The overall experience felt very cheap which is unacceptable at the price they charge. Find something else to do in town.
Not even worth reviewing! I was also there on Valentine weekend and ended up going to eat at another business after. Show was tacky however I will say I enjoyed Trixy. The food was less than inedible, they offered two drinks you can't get more of anything even if you ask. They serve frozen cheesecake factory cheesecake (the only okay part of the night). FOR SURE NOT WORTH THE MONEY OR THE TIME!!!!
Horrible! Maybe we were expecting to much, but it's not worth $39 a ticket, the show took close to an hour to start after it's scheduled time. The whole show was very amateurish, the "actors" served as the waiters, the food was just disgusting, I too have no idea what that white sauce was nor what the heck that bland rubbery rolls they tried to pass off as chicken. I attended the 11/13/2010 and was one of the people that walked out. Don't do it listen to the reviews, I'm not one to walk out, so I don't waste my money but it was too much to handle.
In 10 years of living in Tucson, this is the worst idea I have ever suggested to my friends and family. No Mystery here give it up, the acting is pitiful, food beyond explanation and yes what was that white "sauce". Definately NOT for children bordered on pornograhic. No words can describe how I wanted to just get up and walk out like some of the other tables did but having paid $39.00 a person we saw it through to the end. One would think after 40 years you would just get better, not the case with this one, please fellow theater goers pass this one up......
This was the biggest waste of 3 hours of my life and a total rip-off. Lame dialogue, props, talent and definitely not kid-friendly despite what the delusional owner said. The biggest MYSTERY of the night was what the heck what the white stuff that was poured all over the "chicken." Better Business Bureau, it's time to close the longest running Mystery dinner show in Arizona.......Please.
If there was a ZERO star that's what I would rate this place as. The owner - ROSS HORWICTZ - hung up on me when I called and was inquiring about seating arrangements and he would not honor a certificate to his own establishment! DON'T WASTE YOUR TIME AND HARD EARNED MONEY TO GO TO THIS ESTABLISHMENT!!! I would reccomend finding something else to spend over a hundred dollars on! Oh, and by the way, gratuity of 18 percent is automatically tacked onto your bill!!! So you're tipping even if you are not satisfied which in my opinion makes me think that there were a lot of unhappy customers and had to start that policy!
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