Just Plain Dumb

Monday, December 1, 2014

Going Out the Way I Came In: Muppet Videos

Posted By on Mon, Dec 1, 2014 at 12:30 PM


I'm crossing my fingers that Insane Clown Posse do something interesting in the next three days so I can really pay tribute to my Range-muses, but in the meantime, it only seems right that someone posted a Muppets vs. 90's-hip-hop video mashup on YouTube yesterday, so I could have something to post. Thanks, internet!

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Tuesday, October 7, 2014

You Were Wondering Who Same Sex Marriage Hurts? This Woman, That's Who

Posted By on Tue, Oct 7, 2014 at 10:39 AM

Image courtesy of Shutterstock
  • Image courtesy of Shutterstock

Monday's choice by the Supreme Court's to decline to hear several cases regarding same-sex marriage didn't mean same-sex couples now have a constitutional right to marry, but it did mean that in 30 states, same-sex couples can marry, either by the state's decision or through this Supreme Court non-ruling.

So, of course, people ARE FREAKING OUT about how the gays are going to ruin all the straight marriages, human sacrifices, dogs and cats are going to live together, mass hysteria, basically.

Hat tip to The Stranger's David Schmader for finding the saddest story ever, an op-ed reprinted by the Deseret News from Janna Darnelle, a Utah woman who had her life ripped apart and who won't stand for this tragedy to be repeated:

Every time a new state redefines marriage, the news is full of happy stories of gay and lesbian couples and their new families. But behind those big smiles and sunny photographs are other, more painful stories. These are left to secret, dark places. They are suppressed, and those who would tell them are silenced in the name of “marriage equality.”

But I refuse to be silent.

I represent one of those real-life stories that are kept in the shadows. I have personally felt the pain and devastation wrought by the propaganda that destroys natural families.

The sad part: Darnelle's husband left her in 2007 after ten years of marriage, announcing he is gay. Totally fair that Darnelle and her two children were devastated by that news. She certainly had expectations for how her life was going to be and this interruption was surely awful. Darnelle, unfortunately seems to believe that her husband woke up one day and decided to be gay, which is unlikely, but let's give her the fact that the "marriage" part of her life has been rough.

However, then the editorial gets a little unhinged:

USA Today did a photo journal shoot on my ex and his partner, my children, and even the grandparents. I was not notified that this was taking place, nor was I given a voice to object to our children being used as props to promote same-sex marriage in the media...

After our children’s pictures were publicized, a flood of comments and posts appeared. Commenters exclaimed at how beautiful this gay family was and congratulated my ex-husband and his new partner on the family that they “created.” But there is a significant person missing from those pictures: the mother and abandoned wife. That “gay family” could not exist without me.

There is not one gay family that exists in this world that was created naturally.

They took photos of her children STANDING NEXT TO GAYS. THE INJUSTICE.

Of course, it gets even worse for these kids as they've been absorbed in the Nightmarish Gay Underworld:

My children are brought to gay parties where they are the only children and where only alcoholic beverages are served. They are taken to transgender baseball games, gay rights fundraisers and LGBT film festivals...My son is now a maturing teen, and he is very interested in girls. But how will he learn how to deal with that interest when he is surrounded by men who seek sexual gratification from other men? How will he learn to treat girls with care and respect when his father has rejected them and devalues them?...

My daughter suffers too. She needs a dad who will encourage her to embrace her femininity and beauty, but these qualities are parodied and distorted in her father's world. Her dad wears makeup and sex bondage straps for Halloween. She is often exposed to men dressing as women...What is my little girl to believe about her own femininity and beauty? Her father should be protecting her sexuality. Instead, he is warping it.

The son? clearly going to end up gay as well. The daughter? Who even knows? Clearly, because of the rainbow-colored hellscape this woman is dealing with, we need to shut down gay marriage. And possibly ban bondage straps.

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Monday, September 15, 2014

The Power of Social Media Is Giving Us a Soda Back We Didn't Want

Posted By on Mon, Sep 15, 2014 at 4:00 PM

While social media campaigns didn't capture Kony or bring back the girls of the Chibok boarding school, at least Facebook Nation can claim one victory, convincing a giant corporation to sell a soda you probably forgot about in a very limited manner:

Coca-Cola Co. newest social-media campaign reaches back to a time when even MySpace didn’t exist.

Surge, a citrus-flavored Mountain Dew knockoff that was discontinued by Coke about 12 years ago, has reappeared in limited supply today. The only place to get it: Amazon.com.

Billed as the company’s first ever e-commerce reintroduction, the news was announced by the Facebook Fan site “Surge Movement,” whose 128,000 members lobbied for its return and paid for a billboard in Atlanta. Coke gave the drink a Twitter account, too, so loyalists can “follow the brand’s journey.”

“Surge is back,” the Facebook page’s organizers said, urging readers to buy and spread the word. “The Movement does not end here!”

If you're interested, Amazon is selling 12 16-ounce cans for $14, but it appears they're out already, which makes me worry about humanity a bit.

Personally, I'd be far more excited to get my hands on some OK Soda, which reflected the ironic ennui of my 90's experience more than the aggro Dew-like aesthetic of Surge, but hey, I might be a Facebook group and 127,999 like-minded nostalgists away from making my retro-dreams come true.

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Wednesday, August 27, 2014

Don't Worry, Christians, Kirk Cameron's Here to Save Christmas

Posted By on Wed, Aug 27, 2014 at 3:45 PM

kirk_cameron_to_the_rescue.jpg

While I grew up with Christian movies that were never going to get near an actual movie theater instead relegated to VHS tapes shown at Friday youth group nights (still love you, Thief in the Night), the recent successes of God's Not Dead ($62 million at the box office on a $2 million budget), Fireproof ($33 million on a $500,000 budget) and others means that you're going to see Christian-themed films on the marquee right next to the big-budget blockbusters for awhile. There's part of the church-going side of me that would hope that someone might use the opportunity provided by the box-office possibilities to make an actual movie about the complexities of faith (a remake of Make Way for Tomorrow, maybe?), but hey, instead, we get something from noted theologian Kirk Cameron about the nonsense "War on Christmas." Woo hoo.

Well, you've got to love any movie with a character named "Christian White," who actually makes some valid points about the celebration of Christmas before Kirk Cameron tells him to enjoy himself and just buy some stuff at the mall or something. I personally grimaced at hearing a list of things we're supposed to enjoy about Christmas that puts "feasting" ahead of "selfless giving of yourself to others" or "remembering and caring for those who might be less fortunate than us" (neither made the countdown, but hey, at least "dancing" got a mention, but hey, as long as we can bully another retail worker, abused by absurdly long shifts and the worst of humanity driven by an endless thirst for stuff we don't really need, into saying "Merry Christmas" instead of an equally pleasant and wildly more considerate to our polycultural society remark like "Happy Holidays," then Kirk Cameron's work will all be worth it.

Kirk Cameron's Saving Christmas is set to be released in a theater near you on November 14.

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Monday, August 18, 2014

Charlie Sheen Uses Ice Bucket Challenge to Talk to Former 'Two and a Half Men' Co-Stars

Posted By on Mon, Aug 18, 2014 at 1:45 PM



We are tired of the Ice Bucket Challenge, but it's for a good cause. Apparently, you're supposed to waste good drinking water by dumping it on your head to raise money for Amyotrophic lateral sclerosis. There have been a number of celebrities that made this challenge popular, but Charlie Sheen has found a way to ruin it for everyone.

UPROXX shared TMZ's video of Sheen dumping $10,000 over his head instead of ice. He called out former Two and a Half Men costar Jon Cryer and the producer Chuck Lorre to do the same. He also mentioned his replacement Ashton Kutcher, but not Angus Jones.

Click here to donate some money to the ALS Foundation, or you can dump water on your head. 

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Monday, August 11, 2014

Here's The Most Unpredictable Fight You Will See All Day

Posted By on Mon, Aug 11, 2014 at 11:35 AM


We don't condone violence, so don't get any funny ideas. I found this obscure fight on Reddit, and I was bit underwhelmed until the one-minute mark. I don't know who won this match, but the video is titled "The coolest fight in the world" for a reason. 

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Tuesday, July 15, 2014

AZ Rep. Adam Kwasman Mistakes YMCA Campers for Migrants

Posted By on Tue, Jul 15, 2014 at 7:24 PM

click image SCREEN GRAB THANKS TO AZCENTRAL.COM
  • Screen grab thanks to azcentral.com

I think we can all unanimously agree that Tuesday’s gathering in Oracle wasn't Arizona’s proudest hour. Our bloggers James Hudson and David Safier made the trip and grabbed some photos from the gathering, but I imagine we can totally concur that the Republic's Brahm Resnik struck gold.

Republican congressional candidate Adam Kwasman was caught describing the concern he witnessed on the faces of the migrant children on the bus that drove by the assembly. He tweeted "Bus Coming. This is not compassion. This is the abrogation of the rule of law. #AZ01" with a picture of the yellow school bus driving away. But he didn't realize it was a bus full of local YMCA children going to camp.

Continue reading »

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Friday, May 23, 2014

Neko Case Shuts Down MTV After Sexist Tweet

Posted By on Fri, May 23, 2014 at 6:30 PM

Here's another example of why you shouldn't mess with Neko Case. The official Playboy Dot Com Twitter page mentioned Case to  Tim Grierson's album review. The tweet referred Case "is breaking the mold of what women in the music industry should be."

Thanks to Carly G Marie, here's a screen grab of their conversation:

nekocase.jpg

Unfortunately, the review wasn't any better: 
For women, it’s more bankable to be alluring—whether that comes in the form of the confident straight shooter (Beyoncé), the girlie pinup (Katy Perry) or the coquettish ingenue (Taylor Swift)—or to reject outright such conventions and be a hell-hath-no-fury flamethrower (Fiona Apple).
(Help from HuffPo Women)

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