In honor of Valentine’s Day, we were recently handed $125 in gift cards from our friends at Fascinations, and encouraged to give them away to our talented and passionate readers in whatever way we saw fit.
After we dismissed the original ideas (including a KY wrestling tournament), we happened upon a fantastic thought: “What if we ran an erotic fiction contest?” And beyond that: “What if that contest involved the Weekly?”
Thus, 150 Shades of Shame was born.
So dear readers, we direct you to the Contest link here and above, or to the space below the jump, for the rules.
What we’re looking for are the kinds of things that one would read in romance novels — but without the spectacular character development and sharp, nuanced prose.
We’re looking for the good stuff — the tender love-making, the dirty role-playing, the hilarious anatomic mishaps — that you’d find buried between pages of longing sighs in most novels. The more heaving the bosom, the more turgid the wang, the better.
Be creative. Be clever. Be funny. Don’t hold back.
All we ask are that you adhere to these caveats:
1. Your short story must, in some way, mention the Tucson Weekly (which is where the shame comes in). Whether that mention is through an issue swept off of a counter top before a passionate kiss, a chance meeting in the vicinity of Weekly World Central, or (God forbid) an encounter between two staffers, it’s all fair game.
2. Keep the story at or around 150 words. This is, after all, 150 Shades of Shame, not 275 Shades, Plus Some Footnotes About Lube.
The prizes:
Our First Place winner will receive $75 in Fascinations gift cards, for use in any way he or she may see fit. We only ask that you spread the love—in a legal way, of course.
Two Second Place winners will receive one $25 Fascinations gift card each—enough to provide a starting point for a lovely evening.
Stories will be judged by the fair, impartial (and given the likely tone of the entries, possibly inebriated) staff. The entry period runs now through Feb. 9. Send your entries along to TucsonWeeklyContests@gmail.com.
We also reserve the right to publish entries in the print edition of Tucson Weekly, and/or on TucsonWeekly.com.
Good luck, and let’s get it on!
This article appears in Jan 31 – Feb 6, 2013.
your wanting to publish porn without pictures……awesome.
sick
Mammey/Conservative Independent: Guess I know which two commenters I’m including in my story. I have some ideas of what you two might be into, but how do you feel about kissing? Is that too personal?
suggested story line.
Former Mayor Walkup having group sex with the former Rio No Wayo Board of Directors.
There MUST be some explanation for such mismanagement. Why no sexual befuddlement?
Dan, please cease in this attempt to distort reality by shorthanding your statements with labels. I’m probably farther left than you, but fail to see the humor in stupidity. Does that push me to the right? Get real, get some firm beliefs and stick to them. Your ego’s getting in the way of your intellect. Regards, Mammey
Does the title count toward the 150 words?
Another thing, David Mendez. Animated GIFs. May they be embedded in the story and, if so, what is their word count? Or, are they to be relegated to footnotes? And what about footnotes in any format…word count toward the 150, or no?
It’s important to think things through.
Please advise.
This is brilliant. I’m submitting now. I want a new vibrator.
Mammey: What label? What on earth are you talking about?
@Dan G. Re “Mammey: What label? What on earth are you talking about?” — I think he misread your addressing another commenter for a label in your earlier comment.
@J_in_Cochise: Ah, I get it. Mammy, you’re hilarious and adorable.
Sorry Dan, did misread. But, to lay this smut open where kids can read it begs the question of responsibility of adults to “teach your children well.”
Is this attitude of permissiveness the reason you hear children utilizing 4 letter words in front of strangers? Or would a bit of restraint be appropriate here?
@Mammey: for one thing, it’s the parents’ job to raise their kids and to monitor/regulate what they are exposed to, not the Weekly’s. If some/many/most parents don’t assume the responsibility, it’s STILL not the Weekly’s.
Second, have you not looked in the back of the Weekly? Have you never read Savage Love, seen the photos or read the personals? The so-called “smut” is already there. I doubt that a few short stories will be the downfall of Tucson.
Third, does it even matter? What’s worse- kids being exposed to a little raunchiness or kids being raised to think sex is taboo?
Mammey: I actually pay quite a bit of attention to what my kids see online, but I also teach them to understand that some things are for adults. My kids don’t use profanity in front of strangers, but thanks for your concern.
Luna. Enjoyed your simplistic response. Food for thought. Snack food for thought.
Each of us, in our own way, are creating that environment children are born into, and hence their outlook on life. Direction toward a healthy life starts with societal norms
which are fluid and created and recreated by us all daily. Historically, the best way
to do this was for everyone to get involved. If you saw a kid misbehave, you’d smack ’em in the head, (yours or others), and they’d get the message quickly. Didn’t always work,
but you get the picture, kids would be more reluctant to misbehave in front of adults.
The norm was to not misbehave in front of adults. If you make it normal to be sexually perverted, then there’s going to be suffering and lost lives because of the parallel societal norm of jail time for sexual offenders, (i.e. the two 20something school aides caught being sexual with minors last week). Mammey.
Dan, raising kids is like playing volleyball without being allowed to touch the ball. You only have indirect control, that control being the standards you embed in their heads,
(as opposed to those you expose them to). When there’s a conflict, the kid’s egos
become the defining factor, grabbing on to their own self-image as a constant. You can’t teach these things as a blanket, you must get them to construct their self image with it.
Exposure to ideas from those without restraint and sense of morality (example: drug dealers) confuses their heads. They’ve not got time in grade or time in service, so they are vulnerable to nonsense. Nonsense needs be weeded out by defining our cultural norms with care and due diligence.
Mammey: So, we should censor content that doesn’t fit within the cultural norms you’d like to set for your own children? There shouldn’t be content anywhere that’s specifically for adults? This is an interesting theory, for sure.
LOL @ Mamme. What do we live in MayBerry? Good lord, do not put the rearing of your children on society.
We all know that Mammey is going to submit 12 different entries under 12 different names, and bookmark the online results of this contest for regular lunch break reading.
You guys is fun. Dan, don’t believe in censorship, believe in responsibility at all levels. The advanced civilization we all dream of requires it. If you don’t wish to be civilized, then be quiet when you shout out things that work against my desire to live a happy, productive and safe life. Spent years in south central seeing the breakdown of society. Shhhhhhhh with the smut. Keep it under lock and key behind closed doors.
Burnie, Mayberry’s a better norm than ho’s ville and the drug ditch. To see the eyes of meth users breaks my heart.
BJP, 14, not 12.